Faith part 3

Okay all. You know - I have to say this. I fear that the majority of my Christian experience has been based on emotion. You know - like, worshipping God at church when the music is just right and I have the tinglies. Oh I sure know how to come to Him when I am in despair or having an anxious moment. But what about now? Things are going pretty good for me right now (well aside from this crisis of faith). My prayer life falls off durong these times. Why? Because I don't feel I need anything from God right now. I have this desire to know more about God, yet don't really feel like spending time in His word. Yeah I know that the way to get to know someone is by spending time with them and that the same holds true for God. Just because I don't physically feel the goosebumps on my arms when I pray, doesn't mean he is not there. Just because perhaps I don't get all riled up in church like perhaps I have in the past doesn't mean that God has somehow left or His presence has left me or that He doesn't love me...His word is true whether I feel it or not. Its true whether I believe it or not. And you know what - I'm going choose to believe it whether I like it or not!

Believing God

Okay real quick:
At the suggestion of someone I've started reading Beth Moore's Believing God. I really want to share an excerpt with you that I read yesterday:

"If you want to be full of faith, don't argue with a legalist! Love them. Serve side by side with them if God wills. Don't judge them. And don't argue with them! Unbelief is highly contagious. Nothing is logicals about miracles. To the degree that we debate matters of faith, we could find ourselves drained of it. We are not called to debate faith but to do it. To be nouns turned into verbs. Presently. Actively.
Keep seeking. Keep believing. I am convinced that the pure-hearted, faith-filled petitioner is going to behold a miracle. Whether lesser or greater, temporal or eternal, wonder never cease.

Faith - Part 2

You know - in the Bible there are many, many times when a prohpet or teacher was relaying a message to the people and when they did so, often times they would begin by telling of what God had done for them in the past. I think in my current situation - I need to do that for myself. I'm posting it here so that there is no question to me (or anyone else, for that matter) that God 1. exists and 2. that he absolutely is who He says He is.

What God has Done for Me
1. I survived my birth even with being born blue, having no amniotic fluid when the doctor went to break the water, and not knowing how to eat on my own.
2. God has kept me in at least 2 cases that I am aware of from possibly being kidnapped.
3. He has kept me from harm in 3 car accidents.
4. He revealed himself to me when I absolutely needed him to.
5. He has never left me without earthly friendships.
6. He protected me in Detroit when there was gunfire a few houses from where I was standing - outside, alone and at night...
7. He has kept me through 2 surgeries
8. He has always kept a roof over my head and food on my table.
9. He protected me when my apartment was broken into in Detroit
10. He protected me in Alamosa when I thought my apartment had been broken into.
11. He protected me the COUNTLESS times I slid in my car on icy roads.
12. He protected me in several instances where common sense would have told others to get out of there...and I didn't
13. He provided a doctor who treated me on an ongoing basis in Alamosa for free.
14. He kept me safe from online predators.

I know I could keep going...but I don't know if I need to. I think its pretty clear. As I was typing this a verse came to mind:

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
2 Cor. 4:8,9

How true, huh? We ARE hard pressed on EVERY side. We have bills, jobs, kids, worries, anxieties, fears, doubts, and all that before lunch! So we are hard pressed, but you know what - we are NOT crushed. To me that means that while we struggle with things like lacking faith, it is NOT going to be the end. Some of you who have left comments (thank you, by the way) have said that its normal to question God - He expects it almost. Oh to have the childlike faith that I used to have when I was....well, a child.

Okay, I'm beginning to ramble...I am a bit tired, I suppose.................*snore*

Faith

Have you ever driven around for a few days with the gas light on in your car? You figure, I can go for another day or so - but actually running out of gas is a constant threat. Well, friends, let me tell you something - my gas light has been on for a while now - I just don't know where to go to fill up. I'm talking about faith, and truthfully, I could use your help here.

Okay, please let me start by saying that I am not ready to throw in the towel, or give up on this whole Christianity thing. Far from it. I've been dealing with this area of faith for a while now - and and seeking advice from you.

So, what is faith? Dictionary.com defines faith as: 1. confidence in a person or thing; 2. belief that is not based on proof. Belief that is not based on proof - ouch. I'm one of those people who wants proof (not that knowing what the Lord has done for me isn't proof enough...). I want to see it to believe it. Anyway - I digress - so, what does the bible say about faith?

Hebrews 1:1-3 "1Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. 2This is what the ancients were commended for. 3By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God's command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible."

2 Cor. 5:7 says "We live by faith, not by sight."

Heb 1:6 "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. "

I thought there was a verse that said something like, "To each one he gave a measure of faith." I can't find that verse. It may not exist, but thats the one I'm trying to find.

Okay - here is what I'm asking. 1. Have you ever been where I'm at before? 2. How do you get more faith? 3. What are your ideas on this subject? Please let me know what you think - I'm going to research too. :) Thanks!

Pictures from the Springs

Just got back from the Springs - had an awesome time. NO, I'm not moving back anytime soon......not saying I wouldn't like to, though, I'm just saying.... :)

Thought I'd update you with some pictures from the trip! I didn't get to take pictures with everyone (Sarah B, Sara D, Brenda...) but, these are the ones I DID get to take. It was really awesome to see everyone - and to not be at work for a few days!!


Janna - my old boss from Compassion.


You see why I love her so much?


Christie and I shared a cube when I first started at Compassion...


Oh Randy......got the scoop?


Haley - I taught her everything I know about Training...


Bill - You'll never find a truer friend.


Robyn - Be thankful I didn't post the OTHER picture Robyn and I took...


Mi Amiga - Elaina


Tara aka T-Mac


Me and Yatron

All in all - it was an awesome trip. I didn't get to see everyone for as long as I'd like to have. I guess thats just the way it goes, huh? I really do miss everyone. Its hard, even being here for 9 months, I still feel like I don't know that many people. Anyway - wanted to post these here for your viewing pleasure!

Oh, and for those of you who still wonder.....my total weight loss after the trip - 34 pounds!!!!! I'm down two pant sizes and one shirt size!!! Can you believe it? Me saying "No" to pasta, cheese, BREAD, cheese, regular soda......the list goes on and on..... Anyway, yeah, thats where I'm at right now! ;)

Jeremiah 3

I've been reading through Jeremiah. I came across this passage yesterday, and I don't know that I've ever read anything like this before. (DISCLAIMER: I am sure I have read something that has touched me like this before....its just been a long time...)I don't even think I need to write about it - it speaks clearly for itself. This is from Jeremiah 3, out of the New Living Translation: enjoy.

19 “I thought to myself,
‘I would love to treat you as my own children!’
I wanted nothing more than to give you this beautiful land—
the finest possession in the world.
I looked forward to your calling me ‘Father,’
and I wanted you never to turn from me.
20 But you have been unfaithful to me, you people of Israel!
You have been like a faithless wife who leaves her husband.
I, the Lord, have spoken.”

21 Voices are heard high on the windswept mountains,
the weeping and pleading of Israel’s people.
For they have chosen crooked paths
and have forgotten the Lord their God.

22 “My wayward children,” says the Lord,
“come back to me, and I will heal your wayward hearts.”

“Yes, we’re coming,” the people reply,
“for you are the Lord our God.

The Sermon

Here is the message from church on Sunday - see previous post to see why I'm posting this.. :)

You can listen to it online from my church website:
Becky's Message
Right click on it and save to your computer. :)

or you can go to our website and download the message from the church website:
Desert Springs Church Sermons



It takes several minutes to download either way, but trust me its so worth it...

If you can't get it to work - I'll send you by CD, so let me know!!

Faulty vision

Evidentally at my church there is a tradition that on Mothers Day the pastors wife, Becky, will give the message. Most of the people I've talked to there have told me, "Make sure you bring tissues on Mothers Day," 'Yeah, okay,' I thought...

Have you ever been at church and thought, "I don't know why everyone else showed up for church today because this message was just for ME!" Yeah, thats awesome and it happened Sunday. Since I've not been at the church a full year, I had never heard Becky speak, and let me tell you - I feel blessed that God is allowing me to be a part of this church. We are going through a series right now entitled, Heroes - Ordinary people with extraordinary abilities. (Yes, its sort of based on the TV show Heroes.......man I love this church!) Becky spoke about sin and us and how God views us and our sin. She brought in her laundry (stay with me here, this is good) and talked about how she and Pastor Brad have different ways to sort the laundry. One does the laundry by specific colors: Blues, Browns, Yellows, etc. and the other does it by lights and darks. She said the one thing that neither of them do is wash everything together in one load. The darks stay with the darks and the lights stay with the lights. Always. This is how God views us and our sin. Separate. When God sees me, he sees me as who he created me to be. My sin is still there, but its in another pile. What we do is we continually lump our sin and our lives together and say, this is who I am. I'm this terrible person who does these terrible things. Its not. I am redeemed. That moment where I told God that I needed him and asked Jesus into my heart, the dirty laundry in my life was separated. Do I still sin? Yes. Does God still view me as a sinner? No. He sees me through his Grace Goggles. Through those goggles, I'm righteous and holy. Romans 6:21 says "so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." She even mentioned that when God talks about our sin he always says, "Your sin has separated you from God," not "because you're such a sinner..." He keeps us separate from our sin. May our prayers this week be that God would allow us to see ourselves the way He sees us, and not through the faulty vision of our own eyes.

I'm going to post the message here once it goes online. It will be here sometime this week. I encourage you to check back and listen to it.

Eeeks

This is a lesson to myself........before applying make up....


and after.......

ALWAYS GO WITH THE AFTER!!!!! ALWAYS!

:)

p.s. if I had photoshop I'd look even better!!!!!

I'm coming to Colorado Springs...

So evidentaly my coming to Colorado Springs for 1 day last month and not telling people that I was coming wasn't the best idea...SO-RRYYY!! Okay, well, I'm letting you know - ahead of time - that I will be in the Springs on May 23-27. My friends daughter is graduating from high school that weekend, so I thought I'd take some extra time and stay a while. So for those of you who like to leave town when I'm in town (Sarah) or who like to schedule plans then not show up (Brenda) or who don't read this blog (Tara) or who do read this blog (You) - you have been dutifully warned. My only plans so far are that I'm going to be at Compassion on that Friday the 23rd around lunch time. Please let me know if you are planning on coming. I also want to have lunch at my favorite place, Tsing Tao....probably Sunday, Monday or Tuesday (or each of those days!!) ;)

Now, don't complain.....you can't say you didn't know...unless you're Tara, because she already told me she doesn't read this blog....but other than that - no excuses!!