I believe, but.....

From my other blog: http://destinationhamilton.blogspot.com

Remember that story about the man who came to Jesus to ask Him to heal his son?
The son had been possessed by an evil spirit that was tormenting him day and night, and his father had come to Jesus for help.
The father said to Jesus, "If you can do anything, take pity on us and help us."
Jesus responded, "'If you can'? Anything is possible for him who believes."
Immediately the boys father said, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"

I have to say that I've always sort of smiled at this story. The father of the young boy proclaims to Jesus, "I do believe!" and in the very same breath says, "Help me in my unbelief!" How can you believe, yet still struggle with unbelief? In the last few weeks I have come to completely understand what this father meant.

I leave for Portland in 18 days (17 days now...). Just over 2 weeks. I believe with all my heart that God has called me to this ministry and that he will provide for me (he has already done miracles for me financially!) - and yet there is still unbelief in my heart. I'm nervous. Sometimes I'm scared. I know that God has promised to never leave us nor forsake us. That he has promised to provide for our every need. That we cannot be taken from His hand. I believe that the Word of God is true. Yet every now and again, I struggle with thinking, "Lord, I know what your word says, but is it for me? Is that promise for me?" I can very easily believe that God will provide for other members of this team. I've seen him work miraculously in the Seger's lives and in others lives. But when it comes to believing those promises for myself - thats where the unbelief starts to set in.

I know what that father meant. I have prayed his prayer over and over again these last few weeks, "Lord, I believe you when you said you will take care of each of my needs. Please help me overcome my unbelief." Or, "God, I know that you will not leave me or forsake me, help my unbelief." And can I just say - he does. Every single time. He helps me over come the unbelief. It comes back, and I ask again, and he helps me again.

Thats why He's so cool. God rocks!

Prayer Requests:
Please pray for the members of the team going to Portland.
It seems that January is the month when most everyone will be traveling to Oregon.
Please pray for safetly on the roads, for good weather and that God will work out all the plans.
Pray for me and Tracy as we leave out on January 8th. Tracy will be flying in and driving back with me.
Pray for a job for each member of the team.

Thank you so much!