One Time with Aimee

Whoa.

2011-07-21T05:35:00.004-07:00

It has been WAY TOO LONG since I've written here.

Like 8 months. I could have almost had a baby in the amount of time its been since I've written! Don't worry... I didn't....

There have been some ups and downs in these last 8 months, but one thing still remains as true as ever: God loves me. No matter what I face, what situations I come across, what struggles I go through, I can rest knowing I can never do anything to change His love for me. I can't do anything that will make God love me more, and I can't do anything that will make Him love me less!

Wow. Well, thats a relief!!! :)

Knowing Him

2010-10-31T07:54:00.004-07:00

Wow, the last few weeks since launch have been really amazing. I can't believe that launch was 6 weeks ago already. I am learning so much more about Him, and seeing glimpses of who I am in Him. Its awesome. Just when I think I have things pretty much figured out - He adds something else to the mix.

At least it keeps things fresh and interesting!

So things for me right now are pretty awesome. God is doing some amazing things in my life. There are areas of my life where I have sought after Him, and he has answered. Even this week, he has fulfilled one of the desires of my heart. He is just so faithful. Yet, I know there is so much more that He wants for me and from me. Oh, I feel like I'm on the edge of an amazing breakthrough in my spiritual life. Its definitely exciting, and scary....and frustrating, since I'm still just on the edge. :)

I've been listening to a series from Desert Springs called "The Christian Atheist." A Christian atheist is someone who believes in God, but lives their life as if He doesn't exist. Wow. Thats a tough thought, huh? Sort of sounds like being lukewarm. And making God want to puke. Not pleasant. Anyway, they were talking about how we can know all about God. We can know all his attributes, and we can recite scriptures. We can even talk to people about him. But do we really truly know him?

Growing up, I loved Bette Midler (yeah, I know - don't laugh - I'm not normal...) I had all her CD's, all her movies. Anytime she was on TV I recorded her, I cut out all the magazine articles I could find about her. I had her movie posters hanging on my wall at a time when most girls my age had New Kids on the Block posters (we've already established that I'm not normal, okay?). I read biographies on her, I knew she was born in Hawaii on December 1, 1945. That her first movie was called, Hawaii. I knew that she started her music career by singing with Barry Manilow in New York City. I knew obscure information, too, like that her sister was killed by a taxi while on the way to one of Bette's performances. I knew all her songs, and could quote most lines from her movies. I even got my hair permed so that my hair would look like hers did in the movie "Beaches." But I didn't KNOW her. I've never met Bette Midler. I've never even been to one of her concerts. The extent of my relationship with her is built solely on factual knowledge and data that I researched during that time.

I know a lot about God. I have favorite verses that I cling to when I'm scared or worried. I know that He loves me, and that he is faithful, and good, and amazing. But how well do I KNOW him? I know that God loves me because the bible says that He does. But have I let that knowledge travel from my head to my heart? Do I live like I am a daughter of the God of the Universe? I am. I know I am, but do I believe that I am? I have to let go of what I know about God, and start having a relationship with him. I have to stop thinking so much about things, and start just trusting him. I have to let go of my preconceived notions of him, things I've been taught about him and allow him to show me who he is. Its MY relationship with God, not anyone elses. I can't expect to truly know him based on biographies or movies or songs or books ABOUT him. Those things can be helpful, don't get me wrong, but the only way I am really going to get to know Him is by allowing him access to my heart. Allowing him to love me. Allowing him to do work in my life.

So that's my goal. Have an intimate relationship with the God of the universe. Might seem a lofty goal, huh? But seeing as the God of the universe wants to have an intimate relationship with me, I'm thinking it will prolly happen. :)

Portico Launch!!

2010-09-22T06:59:00.003-07:00

Disclaimer: Believe it or not, I took ZERO photos at the launch! So, I'm stealing some photos I found on Facebook. :)

Sunday, September 19th
11:00 am
Portland, Oregon

I've been thinking a lot, back to last year at this time. Still living in Phoenix, and having NO IDEA how I would even make it to Portland. Meeting with the team from Wausau Wisconsin over Skype and conference calls. Talking about all that would be happening in September 2010. It seemed so far away at the time, and yet now our launch has come and gone.

Let me start by first of all saying, the Launch of Portico Church was amazing! We have prayed for weeks and months for this day, and God did not disappoint. Launch weekend started for me by picking up some dear friends at the airport, who had flown in from Arizona to be here with us. Pastor Brad and Becky Davis, and Marja from Desert Springs Church in Chandler, AZ. It was awesome to see them. Tracy and I surprised them by meeting them at the airport, holding huge signs and all!!

At about 5:00 Saturday evening we headed to the church for set up. Once set up was done, Pastor Mark had us write down on cards any thoughts or memories about the church, anything God was saying to us, we wrote down on cards and placed into a box to be opened next year at this time and see just what God has done!

Sunday morning started at 8:30 for worship rehearsal. I really felt God even in our rehearsing that morning. I have to say, I am humbled and honored to be a part of the worship team. Tracy is an amazing worship leader!! Pre-service prayer started at 10:15 - and then the guests started arriving. It was wonderful to see all the people we had been praying for there. They were actually there! We had visitors from Turning Point church, who has been an amazing resource to us as we've gotten started here. We had visitors from the Oregon Ministry Network. We had co-workers and neighbors and friends. It was awesome. In all, there were about 75 people there that morning. Pastor Mark spoke on relationships and our relationship with God. Joe and Laurie gave awesome testimonies of how God has used relationships in their own lives to draw them closer to Him.

When it all boils down, the presence of God is all we really wanted for that morning. We wanted God to come in and change lives. To set captives free. To just love on his people. We wanted to create an environment where He was free to do that. I believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that is what happened. I believe lives WERE changed. Mine was and will continue to be. God SO loves his people. Every one of us. Even me and even you. :) To Him be the Glory for the great things he has done this weekend - in a brand new little church - in Portland, Oregon.

First Portico Service

2010-08-22T18:50:00.004-07:00

August 22nd
11:00 am
Portico Church

Today was our first Sunday morning service! So awesome! We've been meeting as a church body for several months already, but today was the first Sunday morning service meeting as Portico Church!

So, we're meeting in a building that the Salvation Army used as their headquarters until last year. The sanctuary is already set up with a stage and pews. We met last night from 7-9 to set up and run through worship for the morning. Even though the place is set up like a church, there is still a lot to do as far as getting all the trussing up. Last nights set up was fairly easy because we haven't got our sound system in yet, so hopefully by next week. :) There are also two childrens rooms that were set up and made ready for the kids in the morning!

Because we don't have our sound system yet, we had acoustic worship. Tracy led worship with Rachel on vocals and me on guitar. I think God really met us there! Then Mark preached from Ephesians 2. He talked about how we used to follow the ways of the world and were hopeless. How if we weren't living for God then we were living for the ruler of the Kingdom of the air, who is Satan. We could not be good enough for God. BUT... "But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved." Eph 2:4,5 Gods grace saved us. Grace isn't deserved and can't be earned. I love it!

I have to say, my favorite part of the service was when Mark was talking about how we were hopeless, then we get to verse 4 and it says, "but". It was at this point in the service Mark gave the quote that I hope he will be remembered for for the rest of his life: "God is the creator of big but's." Yeah - that quote will live on and on... :).

I have to say that I am certainly honored that God called me to serve in Portland. Honored and humbled. I think about how I get to be a part of what God is doing here, and I look at the people I get to do it with and I thank God! I know today is just the beginning. I can't wait to see where we are in a few months or years. Can't wait to see the lives that will be changed. Can't wait to see how Gods name will be glorified in Portland. It happened this morning. At Portico Church.

Paul's Last Lessons

2010-08-10T07:28:00.003-07:00

Second Timothy. Paul’s famous last words. This would be his last letter - his final charge to Timothy. Paul was sentenced to death for his belief in Christ. He was leaving Timothy the most important things he could think of. Paul knew his time was running out. He knew these would be his final words.

As I was reading through 2 Timothy this week, I decided to make a list of all the things Paul instructed Timothy to do in this final letter. Thought it would be a good way to see all of the things Paul thought were the most important things to tell Timothy:

· Fan into flame the gift of God that is in you (1:6)

· For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but of power, of love and of self-discipline. (1:7)

· Do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord (1:8)

· What you heard from me, keep as a pattern of sound teaching (1:13)

· Guard the good deposit that was entrusted to you with the help of the Holy Spirit (1:14)

· Be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus (2:1)

· Entrust to reliable men who will be qualified to teach others the things you heard me say (2:2)

· Endure hardship like a good soldier (2:3)

· Reflect on what I am saying, the Lord will give you insight into all this (2:7)

· Keep reminding them about these things (2:14)

· Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth (2:15)

· Avoid godless chatter (2:16)

· Flee the evil desires of youth (2:22)

· Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments (2:23)

· The Lords servant must not quarrel (2:24)

· Gently instruct those who oppose you (2:25)

· Continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of (3:14)

· All scripture is God-breathed (3:16)

· Preach the word (4:2)

· Be prepared in season and out of season (4:2)

· Correct, rebuke and encourage (4:2)

· Keep your head in all situations (4:5)

· Endure hardship (4:5)

· Do the work of an evangelist (4:5)

· Discharge all the duties of your ministry (4:5)

4th of July

2010-07-06T17:01:00.003-07:00

I love fireworks.

I remember when I lived in Colorado Springs, my dad and I would climb on the roof and watch the fireworks shows from all around the city.

I missed my dad this year.

I WAS able to spend the 4th with my dearest friends here in Portland, though, so - it was great. Mark and Jake found a spot on Skylane Road. Tracy and Rachel tried to stay warm in the cool night air. Cary, Jeannea and Amy joined us. Alli and Maddy had their fill of sparklers... We could see fireworks all over Portland and Vancouver. Was probably the most fireworks I've ever seen. Pretty amazing. We lit off some of our own fireworks as well. The grand finale was to be the "Leapin' Lizards" fountain, a three stage fountain firework! It was awesome!

Was a great night, when we were finished we cleaned up all the leftover firework debris, but the Leapin' Lizards fountain was still a little smoky. Well, we couldn't put it in the trunk with the rest of the trash. And I couldn't keep it inside the car because of the smoke. So, the most logical thing to do was to just hold the thing outside the car window as we drove home. Right? Makes sense? Well, it did. Until the embers were fanned by the wind from the moving car. Tracy says from the backseat, "There are flames shooting out of the top!"

Now, keep in mind - we are driving home through a fairly heavily wooded area. I couldn't just drop the flaming piece of pyrotechnics.... Not only that, there was a bit of traffic. I still wonder what the guy behind us must have thought. Ha ha ha!!

Anyway, we got down the road a bit, and pulled into a parking lot which is where we found a nice puddle to throw the still smoking fountain...and all was well.

Be Careful what you ask for...

2010-06-08T10:30:00.003-07:00

Its a dangerous thing - asking God to rend your heart.

Because He will.

And the result of that prayer is a rended heart. A broken heart.

This past week God has really emphasized in my life my total, complete and absolute need for dependence on Him. In the past, when I would struggle with anxiety or sin or whatever - my first thought would be, "Okay, I need to get someone on the phone or text someone and ask them to pray for me." Now, there is nothing wrong with asking people to pray for us when we are struggling, the bible calls us to bear one anothers burdens, however, I was turning to people for help first, and not to God.

I just returned from a trip of a lifetime to Hawaii (which, there are photos of on Facebook...) It was an amazing trip! Since coming home, I've struggled with heightened emotions and being overly sensitive. Not sure why, other than I asked God to break my heart.

And He answered.

And I am turning to Him each morning for strength to make it through my day. And he is giving me all the strength I need.

Romans 5:3-5 "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."

This verse always made sense to me before - but know I "get" it. No one likes suffering. However, I know me. I am sorry to say that I do not fully rely on God when things are going great. When everything is going perfect, I tend to forget about Him. Not something I'm proud of. So when there is a struggle, as minor as it may be - anxiety, worry, doubt, some sin struggle - those are the things that are keeping me on my knees. And though at times it sucks, I'm so grateful for the struggle. I'm actually rejoicing in my sufferings because its keeping me face to face with God. And now that I'm here - face to face with God - there is no limit to what He can do in my life. He can take this broken, rended heart and mold it into what he had planned all along.

Amazing, huh?

Okay - so church update:
Not sure if I mentioned this before, but the name of the church has been finalized - we are now officially Portico Church!!
You can take a look at the website here: http://www.porticochurch.info
We have found a building in the Hollywood district of Portland, and will begin monthly services on August 15th. The official launch of the church will be September 19th. Thats 10 weeks away!!

So I would like to ask you all to pray for some things for the church:
1. Finances - In order to start this church - we are going to need funds. I know God can do anything!
2. Leadership/Directional Team - Please pray for the leaders of this church who have to make decisions and hear from God about direction.
3. Mark and Tracy Seger - Please pray for them as they lead this group. Please pray that God provide financially for them as they devote their lives to this call.
4. City of Portland - Please pray for the city of Portland. Just know God picked this place for a reason.

Thank you for reading and praying and following me and my rantings. Love you all!

Surrender

2010-05-10T04:42:00.002-07:00

Good morning.

I woke up early today and couldn't go back to sleep, so I thought I'd try writing what I think God has been trying to say the last few days.

Should be interesting, seeing as I'm a bit tired...

I love this journey that I am on. Its frustrating at times. There are times when I wish I would just know what it is God wants me to know so I can move on from here. But the mere fact that I am desiring and longing for more from Him is encouraging to me. Makes me feel like He isn't satisfied with where I'm at either, and that He is still working on me. That is amazing.

This past week I've been seeking as to how to have a broken heart before God. Or even to just be broken. I didn't know how to do that. And I still don't, to be quite honest. But I'm starting to think that maybe its not a matter of ME becoming broken. Maybe it is a matter of me surrendering my heart to him and letting him do the work on it. I do feel like I've given everything over to him, but I know there are parts of my life that I take back when things get hard or when things look uncertain. So maybe this process of rending my heart is more about surRENDering my heart. It may be something I have to do several times a day at first. Maybe even several times an hour.

But I have to do it.

I have to be able to be effective for Him.

I may be the only representation of God some people will ever see. I will be their only experience with Him. For their sake, I can't afford to miss it.

I do love this journey. Frustrating and discouraging as it may be at times, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt WHY I'm going through it. God isn't going to let me settle for the kind of relationship I've always had with him.

He wants more.

So do I.

Being Rended...

2010-04-26T19:09:00.002-07:00

I'm still in the process. The rending process, that is.

Its not as fun as I had originally hoped.

Of course when you think of the word "rend" (being torn apart) I don't know why I would have thought it would be fun in the first place.

So, for the first few days since God dropped this phrase on me, I didn't know what to do. I knew God wanted my heart broken, but how do you do that?

I began to pray, Lord, break my heart. Or if I have to do it, show me how.

Its not that I don't want to be broken, I just don't know how.

So He has really shown me some things over the last few days. Some things I really need to work on.

1. Pride. That was a hard pill to swallow (why do you think that is....pride, perhaps?) ha! Pride comes in different forms. I tend to think of pride as thinking of yourself as better than someone else, or something like that. But it doesn't have to be that. It could be being 'shy' and not wanting to socialize with people for whatever reason. Wondering if people like me. Caring if they like me. When it all boils down, its pride, and I need to work on it.

2. Judging. I heard this at church yesterday. Honestly didn't think it applied to me, because I'm really not judgmental. Or so I thought. The pastor starting going through his checklist of what makes you judgmental. I think I could put a check mark beside each thing he mentioned. I don't remember them all, but one of them was finding faults in people. Little tiny microscopic faults. I don't do it all the time - but I still do sometimes. It needs to stop.

I had a #3 yesterday - but for the life of me I can't remember what it is today. I guess God figures I have enough to work on for right now.

So instead of being prideful, I want to be selfless. I want to open myself up to people and not worry about what might happen. I want to give of myself without any thought of what I might get in return. I want to know that I have pure and clean motives. I want to be an encouragement to others, and not judge them. I want people to see God instead of me. I want to see people the way God sees them, and love them like he does. If I can't do that, then I'm no good to him. Luckily, I'm still breathing, so there is still time to get this right. And I believe Gods word when it says, "being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

He's not finished with me quite yet.

Thank God!

Rend my Heart

2010-04-12T15:49:00.006-07:00

So this past month has been a bit of a blur...

Work is still going well. They had a contest last week to see who could collect the most money, and I actually came in 2nd place! I couldn't believe it!

I also moved into my apartment. Its in an attic of an old house near downtown Portland. Its not much but its perfect for me. I'm just about completely settled in.

We had our second Portico Church launch team service this weekend, and it was great. I absolutley love Portland. I love my church family. I am so thankful that God is allowing me to be a part of what He is doing here. Sometimes I look at my life and I think - How did I get to be so lucky to be here doing what I'm doing with who I'm doing it with... Its amazing to me.

Anyway...I digress...

So, I've started playing the electric guitar. I'm not real good at it yet, but I like it, and want to learn more. Certainly have a lot to learn!

As for me, I'm doing good. I am at a place in my life where I know there is more to my relationship with God. I know I can have a deeper, more intimate relationship with Him. But I can't figure out how to get there. I know its a process, so I'm not going to get discouraged, I'm actually sort of excited to see what God does. I don't want to let another Easter or Christmas go by and not be changed by what Jesus did. I don't want to just say, "Oh how nice, Jesus died for me so that I might live." I should be knocking down the doors of my neighbors telling them about what Jesus did. I should be moved to tears by his death on the cross. I am grateful for what he did, don't get me wrong - I just know that there is more that He wants from me. I don't want to disappoint Him.

For the last couple days I've been thinking about all of this and this phrase keeps coming up in my mind, "Rend your heart." To be honest with you - until I looked it up today, I didn't really know what the word 'rend' meant. Ha!

Rend:
1. to split apart or to tear into pieces violently
2. to tear (ones garment or hair) in aguish or rage
3. to harrow or distress (the heart) with painful feelings
4. to become torm or split

Okay..... so God. You want me to tear my heart into pieces violently. Ha ha ha. Okay, I don't think thats what He means. I'm not super clear what he does mean, though. But I am searching. And in my searching I found this verse:

Joel 2:12, 13 "Even now," declares the LORD, "return to me with all your heart, with fasting and weeping and mourning." Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, Slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity"

Rend your heart and not your garments. In bible times, people would tear their garments as a physical expression of grief or anguish. I think God is saying, He doesn't want a physical expression of my grief but an ACTUAL expression of it. I want my heart to be broken about what he's done. I need my heart to break for those who don't yet know. I need to be burdened and broked. I need to want intimacy with God more than anything else in my life. I need to rend my heart.

So, there it is. I'm in the rending process, I suppose. I am excited. I know that God is taking me through this journey so that I will be closer to Him. I can't wait to get there!!

Trusting

2010-03-21T18:58:00.003-07:00

Trust. Why is it so hard? Why is it so hard to trust God – who is really the only one we can fully put our trust in? Ever since I’ve started this adventure in moving to Portland God has done nothing but prove to me that he is faithful and trustworthy. So now, when I have a million thoughts going through my thick head, I still wonder if He will really take care of me. I trust Him to a point where its comfortable, but beyond that, my faith begins to waver.

Now, I’m not complaining or whining. Truly. I know in my head that God will take care of me no matter what the circumstances. I just need to move that knowledge from my head to my heart. A friend texted me last week (and it was very timely...) She said, "Faith not Fear." That has been my motto for the last few weeks. I want to trust God. I want all he has for me. I want him to be able to use me in the way that he wants to. I want to truly surrender my life to Him without taking it back when things don't look the way I want them to.

Okay, now that I have that off my mind…

Things here are going really well. I have a job, I work in a call center as a customer service rep. Not my dream job, but it pays the bills. I just found and moved into an apartment. I will upload some pictures soon. This apartment was one of the first ones I found online when I moved here, and I didn’t think it could still be available now. It was. So exciting. Will be great to have a space that is my own. Not that I’m not extremely grateful for the people who have let me stay with them since getting here (Mark and Tracy, and Kelli). It just feels like everything is coming together.

A few weeks ago we went to Seattle to visit a church launch service there. It was a fun trip, and I think we learned a lot about what we want to do at our own launch. We were able to visit the fish market and the first Starbucks. Was pretty fun.

We also had our first launch team service on March 6^th. It was great. We had worship and teaching. Can’t wait till the next one! I've started playing the electric guitar. What can I say - I love it! A lot of fun. A bit different from the acoustic, but a fun challenge.

I guess thats about it. Hope everyone is well - leave a comment - let me know you were here. :) Thanks!

6.5 weeks

2010-02-16T19:32:00.002-07:00

I left Phoenix 6.5 weeks ago.

In some ways it doesn't seem like that long ago. In other ways it seems like I've been here much longer.

Here's a rundown on whats going on:

1. I got a JOB! I started working last week at Genesis Financial. I am a customer service representative. I started last Tuesday and I think it my actually be a good fit for me. I'm pretty excited to actually be working - I got a job in less than a month. As a matter of fact - as of last week - every person who had come to Portland and was looking for a job has found one. In this economy - that is truly a miracle.

2. Mark and the team have decided the area of Portland we will be planting in: the Hollywood district. I was driving through that area a few days ago, and really felt like it was a place where God wants to work. Its really awesome and exciting to see what He is doing and very humbling to think that we can be a part of it.

3. We are meeting every Thursday evening to pray and just spend time with each other. That is one of my favorite times during the week. One of my other favorite times during the week is worship rehearsal. I absolutely love it. I'm actually learning to play the electric guitar.... or trying to learn to play.

As far as prayers go:

* Please pray for housing for me. I need to find a really cheap, really close apartment. I don't want to live far from everyone, but the housing in this area is out of my price range. Please also pray for a roommate if that is the best thing for me.

* I would ask for continued prayers for Mark and Tracy. Please pray for continued wisdom and guidance for them. They have a lot of things they have to do in order to get the church going, and most of it is stuff that no one else can help them with.

* Please pray for finances and a church building. We really need a place to meet and the finances to meet there.

I want to thank everyone for your continued prayers. I have really felt them. This whole transition thing has not been the easiest for me - but this week I finally am starting to feel like myself again. The only way its possible is just my complete reliance on God. He has to be my everything. He is - I just have to know that he is. :)

Miss you all - love you so much!!

Updated my Portland Blog...

2010-01-14T15:40:00.001-07:00

Hey all - I've updated my Portland Blog -
http://destinationhamilton.blogspot.com

I believe, but.....

2009-12-22T05:33:00.002-07:00

From my other blog: http://destinationhamilton.blogspot.com

Remember that story about the man who came to Jesus to ask Him to heal his son?
The son had been possessed by an evil spirit that was tormenting him day and night, and his father had come to Jesus for help.
The father said to Jesus, "If you can do anything, take pity on us and help us."
Jesus responded, "'If you can'? Anything is possible for him who believes."
Immediately the boys father said, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"

I have to say that I've always sort of smiled at this story. The father of the young boy proclaims to Jesus, "I do believe!" and in the very same breath says, "Help me in my unbelief!" How can you believe, yet still struggle with unbelief? In the last few weeks I have come to completely understand what this father meant.

I leave for Portland in 18 days (17 days now...). Just over 2 weeks. I believe with all my heart that God has called me to this ministry and that he will provide for me (he has already done miracles for me financially!) - and yet there is still unbelief in my heart. I'm nervous. Sometimes I'm scared. I know that God has promised to never leave us nor forsake us. That he has promised to provide for our every need. That we cannot be taken from His hand. I believe that the Word of God is true. Yet every now and again, I struggle with thinking, "Lord, I know what your word says, but is it for me? Is that promise for me?" I can very easily believe that God will provide for other members of this team. I've seen him work miraculously in the Seger's lives and in others lives. But when it comes to believing those promises for myself - thats where the unbelief starts to set in.

I know what that father meant. I have prayed his prayer over and over again these last few weeks, "Lord, I believe you when you said you will take care of each of my needs. Please help me overcome my unbelief." Or, "God, I know that you will not leave me or forsake me, help my unbelief." And can I just say - he does. Every single time. He helps me over come the unbelief. It comes back, and I ask again, and he helps me again.

Thats why He's so cool. God rocks!

Prayer Requests:
Please pray for the members of the team going to Portland.
It seems that January is the month when most everyone will be traveling to Oregon.
Please pray for safetly on the roads, for good weather and that God will work out all the plans.
Pray for me and Tracy as we leave out on January 8th. Tracy will be flying in and driving back with me.
Pray for a job for each member of the team.

Thank you so much!

Destination Portland

2009-12-05T21:40:00.003-07:00

I have another blog.

I've not shared it with many people...till now.

http://destinationhamilton.blogspot.com/

Its documenting my upcoming move to Portland, Oregon.

Yep. I'm moving to Portland in January! Going to be helping with a church plant!

Very exciting. And awesome. And gut wrenching. And amazing. All at once.

I do encourage you to visit the other blog, will tell you lots more about the upcoming move, the people I'm going with, and most importantly, prayer requests. Please keep me and the others in prayer. God has already shown us favor and provision, and we are all very excited to see what He will do in the coming months!

Experiments

2009-11-04T22:20:00.003-07:00

I like science. I'm kind of a dork in that aspect. I went to Space Camp when I was in 7th grade. I was no stranger to nerdiness. So it should come as no suprise that I sometimes experiment - using myself as a test subject.

Last night I'm in my room - its completely pitch dark and I'm not falling asleep. As I'm laying there, I'm thinking - I'll bet my pupils are extremely dialated right now because of the dark. In order to test my hypothesis, I grabbed my phone, and shot a photo.

See for yourself:

Yep, my hypothesis was correct...

Phoenix Area Ladies!!!!! and Gentlemen's ladies......

2009-10-06T06:07:00.003-07:00

Hey everyone -

Just want to let all the ladies in the Phoenix area that the DSC Women's Freedom conference is coming up Nov. 19-21. Galatians 5:1 says, "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free." For freedom. I know in my life I have been bound by sin, by negativity, by fear and anxiety. Christ set us free so we could know and experience freedom.

I would encourage any woman who is in need of freedom - the sort of freedom Christ brings - to attend this conference. Early bird registration ends this Sunday, October 11. After this Sunday, the registration price goes up. You can learn more about the conference and even register online at: http://www.freedom09conference.com. Please feel free to ask if you have any questions!

Oh, and yes - I'll be there! :)

Awesomeness

2009-10-03T11:09:00.005-07:00

Have a few updates to share this go around....

First, this week I had to go down a pant size...actually a couple pant sizes! Depending on the brand, I've gone down between 4-6 sizes! What?! (at least I think....from a 22 to a 16/18ish....) Okay, thats cause for celebration, right? I got myself a new scale, and have lost 3 pounds since last week (could just be the new scale....but I don't care.) So my total weight loss to date is: 27.2 pounds!

As if that weren't enough....this Thursday I have an amazing opportunity:

Have you seen this show on ABC? It might be off the air for now, it may be a summer show, but a few weeks ago I applied to be on it.... and guess what - and a couple weeks ago they called. I will be flying to LA on Thursday, Oct 8 to audition to be on the show!!

I will SO win.

Just you wait.......

Weight Watchers Update

2009-09-26T15:14:00.001-07:00

I've lost 24.2 pounds!!! thats like......a lot! :)

Why'd I do that?

2009-08-23T17:12:00.002-07:00

So, I had an extra earring in my car, and thought, "Hmm, what can I do with this?" I already had earrings in my first set of earring holes, and my second set of earring holes had closed up.

I looked around my car.

I spotted a thumbtack.

I now have a 3rd earring in my ear....and a really sore earlobe.

What a Week!

2009-08-16T15:37:00.006-07:00

This has been some week, I tell ya. Let me give you the rundown:

(the following all occured on ONE DAY)

1. Set the alarm clock for the wrong time. Woke up late.

2. Heard on the radio that the highways were a mess and backed up because of the rain (which, come on - why do people have to drive like idiots because of a few drops of water....)

3. Left the house 1.5 hours early for work - to make sure I had enough time to get there (because of the idiot drivers)

4. Got to work in PLENTY of time - decided to make a stop to the store to get breakfast.

5. Came out of the store. My car is NOT where I left it.

6. OH CRAP

7. I locate my car - across the parking lot - where it had rolled into another vehicle.

8. OH CRAP

9. Assess the situation - driver of the other car is not in sight. I do the Christian thing - LEAVE THE SCENE! (sure, I was convicted - but I tried not to let that bother me...)

10. High tail it back to work where I discover I have lost my phone. Did I leave it at the store? Is God trying to make me do the right thing?

11. Drive BACK to the store - locate my phone in the shopping cart I had been using. Decide I should go to Customer Service and let the other driver know about the 2 inch mark I left on their bumper.

12. YAY - The other driver wasn't around.

13. Now I'm late for work.

14. Get to work - a button falls off my shirt and one is dangling dangerously... (not to mention I had ALREADY sewed two buttons back on that shirt that morning!!)

Wow, think thats enough for the week? Yeah, I did too. But then I was in the shower last night trying to get the conditioner to the top of the bottle so I could actually dispense the stuff - and being a large, heavy, slippery bottle - I lost my grip on it and it fell - no SLAMMED, full force - into my ankle ripping off flesh in the process....

Sorry its blurry..... the picture doesn't do this wound justice. I nearly lost consciousness due to the blood loss......well, maybe not - but it did hurt, and there was skin and stuff hanging off it.

Good times.

Hoping for a better week this week!! :)

Short Story

2009-07-31T20:32:00.006-07:00

I know, I know - its been almost two months since I've posted.

Sorry.

I don't even have much to say, except I'm going out on a limb here. I wrote a short story. Really short. Just a few paragraphs, but want to share it with you. Let me know what you think. There are parts that might be confusing to you....I know what I meant, but you might not. :) (comment at www.onetimewithaimee.blogspot.com for my Facebook friends...)

He took into consideration every detail to make her perfect. Beautiful hazel eyes, wavy brown hair, and soft olive skin. He put in her a heart of mercy and a spirit of encouragement and when he was finished he stood back and gazed at what he had created. He loved her. He loved her not because of anything she had done or anything she would ever do he just loved her because she was his creation. She was His daughter and he was her Father. He would do anything for her. He would die for her.

He had knit her together in her mothers womb and she was born on a cool December night. He knew that by simply sending her into the world he created for her that they would be separated for a time. How he wished for her to know him. He had made her, after all. They had been together before. Did she remember? Would she know Him who had gone through so much. Would she ever know all that He had done for her? Would someone tell her about Him?

He was her king and she his princess. She was mighty. She was bold. She had the all of the kings power within her, but she didn’t know any of it. For there was another at work in her life. An enemy whose sole intent was to rob her of the power and purpose that the king had given her. Though she was created in the image of a mighty king, the enemy would have her believe she was not beautiful enough. Though the king had made her victorious in all things, the enemy told her she was defeated. She listened to the enemy’s lies, and though he had no power of his own – he had power over her. She saw herself an ugly, defeated mess. She was deceived. She believed the enemy.

She would never forget the day that she heard her Father’s voice for the first time. She thought it a familiar voice, though it was unlike anything she had ever heard before. It was comforting and loving and she wanted to hear him speak more and more. And speak He did. He spoke directly to her heart. He told her of his love for her and how beautiful she was. He told her that He wanted nothing more than to pour himself into her and love her and call her his own. He told her the story of when he created her. He told her she was fearfully and wonderfully made. It was as though she remembered Him somehow. She began to trust Him. She began to believe in Him. As she listened He asked for her heart. He asked for her life. What could she say? He was her Father. He was her King and she his princess. Her heart was His. Her life was His. She was back in the loving arms of her creator, her sculptor, her potter, her Father. There she would stay all her days.
2009 - Aimee Hamilton

His Grace is Enough

2009-06-03T18:12:00.003-07:00

Ever come across one of those passages that you have read about a million times, but suddenly you get it. It happened to me today. Not that I didn't understand the passage before - I just needed to hear it today. :)

This has been one of those weeks. Its only Wednesday, and I'm ready for the weekend (okay, truth be told.....I was ready for the weekend on Sunday......). I don't really even have anything to complain about. I'm healthy, have food to eat and a roof over my head. I'm blessed. Sometimes, we find ourselves in situations we just don't want to be in. Sometimes other people cause us to be in those situations - sometimes we cause ourselves to be in them. But regardless of how we got there, we're there. I sort of find myself in a situation like that right now. One of those things I mostly brought on myself, and now I have to deal with it. The thing is I don't want to deal with it. I want God to take it away. I know he can do it. Its too hard to deal with. I'm sure God knows that, but for some reason he is ALLOWING me to go through this. At least now I think I know why...

This morning I really wanted to hear from God. No, I needed to hear from him. I cracked open my bible and turned to 2 Corinthians 12:

7To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great
revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to
torment me. 8Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9But
he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in
weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so
that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight
in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For
when I am weak, then I am strong.

Now, I've read this passage lots of times. Hundreds probably. I've heard songs written about this verse. But, I'm telling you, when I read this today - I understood it. I overwhelmingly felt God, the God of the Universe come to me and say, "Aimee, I know this is hard. But trust me, MY grace is enough for you. It really is. You are weak right now, but it is because I want to make my power perfect in you."

His grace is sufficient.

His grace is all I need. Its all you need.

His power is made perfect in my weakness. Its when I'm weak that I am strong, and not with strength that is my own - but because his power is being made perfect within me.

Am I still in the same situation I was before? Yes. Does it still suck? Yes. Will I get through it? Of course. Its not even that big of a deal, in reality. It is to me though, and if it is to me, then I know it is to God. He felt like my friend this morning. His grace really is enough.

Weight Watchers...again

2009-05-09T18:26:00.002-07:00

Okay folks. Its Saturday. Weigh in day. Ate late last night. Evidently, that didn't matter - I still lost 5 lbs! Whoop Whoop!! (that was me, tooting my own horn.) So to celebrate, I went out and got my hair done.....and yes, Elaina.....my eyebrows waxed. Pics will be uploaded soon! :)

Weight Loss - Update

2009-05-02T14:01:00.001-07:00

5.6 lbs. Not too shabby, eh? :)

Weight Watchers....round 2

2009-04-26T17:23:00.003-07:00

Okay, I'm doing it again. Yesterday, I went back to Weight Watchers and am going to start their program....again. But this time - I've got help!

I started Weight Watchers yesterday. I put most of the 32 pounds that I lost last year back on. So....I'm not where I started....but I'm close.

Three friends from church are going with me, and we're going to be encouraging each other and spurring one another on.

.......anyone got a twinkie?

Inked

2009-04-20T22:21:00.004-07:00

I did it.

Means God is my Deliverance/God is my Refuge

There is WAY more to this story though. Let me start at the beginning.

So, I knew I wanted to get inked. I knew I wanted it to be significant and have profound meaning (if to no one else but me). I love Hebrew script. My first idea was to get the name of God in Hebrew. But since God has, like a million names, which one would I choose? Okay, so then I thought, what has God done for me that I want to monumentalize in a tattoo? Again, thats like a million things. Then it hit me. In the past year God has delivered me from something that I had been struggling with for 13 years. Thats it - I wanted something about God delivering. Well, not speaking Hebrew or knowing anyone that does - I was hard pressed as to where to begin looking. I found a website, Hebrew4Christians.com (which is a pretty cool website, anyway) and it has many names of God in Hebrew script, but nothing I was looking for. So I pulled out my old Strongs Exhaustive Concordance, and found palti'el: God is my Deliverance. I copied the miniscule script from the back of the book (seriously, it was no more than 2 mm big) and I placed my faith in my extensive knowledge of the Hebrew language that #1. What I wrote on my paper was actually Hebrew and #2 that it meant God is my deliverance. So, with paper in hand I pick a tattoo place out of thin air and hop in the car. Who knew you had to make an appointment?
Not me. Anyway, the girl who is making the appointment takes my paper back to one of the tattoo artists and a few minutes later comes out and says, "She wants to see you." Okay. So I go back there. The artist, Jen, says, "So, what does this say?" I tell her God is my Deliverance. She says, "Yeah, sort of." I'm thinking, what do you mean sort of..... So I'm real quiet. She says, "Well, I'll double check with my dad, He is an Israeli, just to make sure that you've got it right."

Okay, time out.

I happen to pick out a tattoo place, that happens to have a tattoo artist who knows Hebrew and whose father happens to be a Hebrew speaker? You have GOT to be kidding me.

So, I can rest assured - God is my deliverance is, in fact, what has been permanantly inked on my ankle.

p.s. Don't tell my mom....she doesn't know about this yet.........

Nerd.

2009-04-14T19:22:00.002-07:00

So I picked up some friends of mine at the airport last night. While I was waiting for their flight to get in, I parked in the cell phone lot for a few minutes. I had had a long day and thought I could use a little rest, so I leaned my seat back and kicked my feet up.
A few seconds later I hear someone honking, and I'm assuming its at me cause all they could probably see in my car was my feet sticking up over the steering wheel. Maybe they wanted to make sure I was okay. I just didn't know. Then I realized......it was ME honking.

Nerd.

Has it really been that long?

2009-04-11T19:41:00.003-07:00

Wow - been nearly a month since I've posted... I can't believe it!

Not too much is going on round these parts.

Church is still going great. I'm there a lot. I love it. What can I say? :)

Job is going ok. They laid off some people a couple weeks ago, then transferred others around to different offices. Still very blessed to have a job at this point.

Family is good. Nothing new going on there. Noelle just turned 7 years old and Taylor will be 2 in August. Crazy how time flies.

I have been in AZ for 1.5 years. Feels like I've been here forever.

I'm going to get my first tattoo very soon. Its Hebrew for God is my Deliverance because, well, God IS my deliverance! :)

I guess that is all for now. Write and let me know what you want me to write about.

The Extra Mile

2009-03-16T09:16:00.004-07:00

a few weeks ago I was in a drama for a youth retreat at my church. It was awesome. The play was called, "The Extra Mile," and it was about two teenage boys who are struggling with cancer. One of the boys is a Christian and one is an athiest.

I played Mrs. Grigglesby, the older and a bit looney, support group leader for terminally ill children. I wanted to share some of the pictures of the drama with you.

For your viewing "pleasure..."

Mrs. Griggleby and the therapy group.

James - the Christian

Mrs. Grigglesby late for the bus

James and Tony - after Mrs. Grigglesby has a hairpiece malfunction

Another malfunction

Little Miracles

2009-02-24T22:17:00.005-07:00

God rocks.

Thats all there is to it.

I'm going to post a story that was written by a good friend of mine, Tracy. Its a story of just how awesome our God is, and how he cares about every little detail in our lives. This story has encouraged me so much this week - I hope it does you too! (A little background information - Tracy is my friend - Mark is her husband and Allison is their 4 1/2 year old daughter...not that you wouldn't have picked that up reading the story....I'm just saying....)

"Fiana is the new addition that God choose to give us yesterday. She is a beautiful chocolate lab. I think this story is one of the most personal acts of God that I have ever seen. Allison has wanted a dog forever and we had planned on getting her one for Christmas but our circumstances did not permit that. It made me really sad to not give her the only thing she had asked for. But God had a bigger plan. I love
Him!
On Saturday we were having a garage sale and we received a phone call from great friends of ours who have been missionaries in Ireland for 17 years. They are here in the US right now raising there funds to go back to Ireland for another term. They said that they would be in Phoenix for one night and could we come see them. Of course we said yes. While at dinner they told us they would be speaking at Baseline Assembly in the morning and asked if we could come. So on Sunday morning we got ready and headed to church to hear our friends speak. The whole morning I had a pit in my stomach. I felt a little anxious. I told Mark on the way to church that I just sensed that today (Sunday) was going to bring something but I didn’t know what. We had decided recently that we were going to give above and beyond our tithe and had been setting that aside over the last couple of weeks. Mark said that he wanted us to stop and get some cash to give Larry and Ann so we headed for Target. When we came out and started to drive away we seen this white truck with the signs for AKC labs. Mark asked if I thought we should stop, knowing how badly Allison wanted a dog, I wondered if it was a good idea. So anyhow we stopped. Allison of course fell in love with these beautiful little puppies. When we asked how much they were the man said $450. Ok so there was NO WAY! So we stayed for a little bit and played with them. Mark said to them right as we left would you take $100? They of course said no.... of course we didn’t have a $100 so it was pretty funny! Right as we walked away the lady said… let me have your number and if we have one left at the end of the day maybe we can do something. So we gave our numbers.
When we got in the car Allison was sooooo disappointed. She asked if the lady was going to call us and kept saying how much she would love a puppy. I was kinda sorry we stopped. So Mark told her to ask God to give her a puppy, to provided a way for us to get one. And we told her if this was the puppy for her He would make a way. So she did. And then she said “God said I can have one.”
Wow… now what do you say! We continued to church and sat through the sermon. At the end we waited for Larry and Ann to finish so we could say goodbye. Ann got finished so we walked up there and loved on her and said our goodbyes. As I was about to walk away she put something into my hand. When I got into the parking lot I looked and there was a $100 bill. I knew the second I looked at it that God was giving us a puppy!! We headed home and the whole time Allison asked.. “are they going to call now.” We waited and waited! Finally Mark was on the phone to one of his friends and I heard him say “I have another call, can you hold on.” And then, “Yes we are still interested.” It was obviously the lady and she gave us this beautiful little puppy. Allison and me danced around downstair shouting and crying “God is giving us a puppy… we are getting a puppy!” I love God He is soooo good. I called Ann to let her know and she said that God had told her that morning to give us the $100 and she said “God heard Allison’s prayer before she even prayed it.”
The funny thing is is that both Mark and I have learned so much from this. In the midst of a crazy time and economy God cares about even the smallest things in our lives. He has showed Allison that He answers her prayers there are so many lessons I don’t even know where to begin. But ultimately, God loves us, sooo much."
Fiana

The enemy is a failure.

2009-02-11T22:19:00.002-07:00

Remember math? I remember in any of my high school math classes thinking, "When am I ever going to need to know ANYTHING about a hypoteneuse?" That day hasn't come, but remember those logic questions they used to ask? Like if A=B and B=C then A=C. Or something like that. You could also do the opposite too, like if A=B but B does not = C, then A does not = C. (trust me - this is going to be okay...)

So God impressed a verse to me today.

Is. 54:17 "No weapon formed against you shall prosper." Another version says that no weapon formed against you will stand. An antonym (or opposite) of stand or even prosper could be fall or fail. Right? So, I thought about wording the verse like this:

Every weapon formed against you will fall or fail.

Every thing the enemy comes at us with will fail. Nothing he comes at us with will prosper! How cool is that? I'm probably using extremely bad theology - so.....don't memorize MY version of the verse, ok? :)

Who knew math would come in handy while expounding on verses? I didn't. I wonder what else its useful for?

Long time no see

2009-01-25T20:32:00.006-07:00

Its been a while since I've written here. I saw my name on another blog with the last updated date being three weeks ago.....sorry.

In that time we rang in a new year. Fun times.

I had a colonoscopy and woke up in the middle of the procedure. That was fun - I have pictures. Will email them if you want (or you can see them for free on my Facebook.) Got a good report from the doctor on that, so thank God!

Went to Disneyland with the family. My parents, sister, 2 nieces and grandmother all drove to the Magic Kingdom, and I flew out later that week. It was great! I swore that I would never ride the Hollywood Tower of Terror - a 13 floor drop stright down. I did it many years ago in Florida and a similar ride at Six Flag Elitch Gardens in Denver. I hated them. I'm not a fan of heights. At all. Except in an airplane, I guess. I like that. But my sister talked me into going on it this time. I loved it. She hated it. Oh how the tables have turned. Bought a Jack Sparrow wig and ring to go with my costume for this year's Halloween. Yeah, already planning. Its only 9.15 months away, you know.

Was thinking about purchasing this get up.....

Noelle really was happy...

See?

Still love my church, and I must say I keep quite busy with it. I am barely ever home. When I am - I'm playing video games. What can I say?

Work is work. Thats all I have to say about that.

Tonight on the way home from a long day of church, lunch and shopping - my tire gave out. Luckily it was a mile from my parents house. Unluckily they weren't home. Luckily they have cell phones. Unluckily they were attempting to have dinner at the Cheesecake Factory when I called. Luckily, the love me and left the restaraunt to come help me. Unluckily changing a tire can be messy. Luckily my dad did it. Unluckily for him I had a camera. Luckily my dad didn't know...

My Dad changing my tire

My mom showing her disdain from being interrupted during her dinner.

Fun with Numbers

2008-12-28T21:23:00.002-07:00

I thought we'd have some fun with numbers on this little edition of "One Time With Aimee"

2 - the number of really truly awesome Christmas presents I got this year. I don't want to give away how spoiled I am - but I will be rocking like a HERO playing GUITAR on a BOX marked with an X............

362 - the number of times in the month of December I thought, "Man I hate that Christmas song..."

31 - the age I turned this month.....ugh.

96 - the percentage that I have in my leadership class at church.

4 - the number of songs we performed in our church choir! How fun was that?

1 - the number of presents my 1 year old niece Taylor opened for herself.

10 - the number of presents the rest of us had to open for Taylor.

23 - the number of dollars I won from our annual tradition of Lottery scratch off tickets in our stockings.

4 - the number of times I told my 6 year old niece that Santa had crashed into a mountain and there would be no Christmas.

7 - the number of days until my colonoscopy (yes, I know - I'll ask for pictures...)

278,760 - the number of Christmas lights we saw on our outing with our Young Adults group at church.

35 - the number of minutes it takes me to get to work from my new place living with my aunt.

45 - the number of degrees it is outside right now at 9:30 pm.

64 - the number of degrees it is INSIDE the house right now (it was 61 earlier....)

12 - the number of times I've wondered if we're gonna turn the heat on in this place.

0 - number of times I've actually ASKED if we're gonna turn the heat on in this place

10 - the number of minutes it took me to remember that they never turn the heat on - even in Colorado when I was housesitting and there was 9 inches of snow outside and I had to sit in front of the fireplace wrapped in blankets just to stay alive. I think I could see my breath inside that day..... sure seems like I would have remembered that quicker than 10 minutes.

And this concludes F-f-f-f-f-f-un with N-n-n-n-n-n-umbers. (get it - cause I'm cold and chattering...)

Tagged

2008-12-22T19:22:00.004-07:00

I was tagged by Holly. I think I'm supposed to post the 4th picture in my photo files...oh how I wish it were the 5th photo....

Please...don't ask me why I have this scanned...but yes, this was my drivers license from Michigan. One nice thing about that license - no weight is listed!

I have no Computer

2008-12-16T19:46:00.002-07:00

I have no computer. When I lived with my parents I used theirs - now there is nothing. No happiness to my life anymore.... ha ha ha. Totally kidding.

Okay, so I'm writing this on my cousins computer (which, incidentally is a Mac....I need one of these). Wanted to at least update you on the latest happenings.

....

Yeah, there is not much going on. My birthday was yesterday. I'm 31. That doesn't even look right to me. Ugh. Oh well, guess that means I'm officially a grown up. Still feel like I'm 24 - young and dumb. Guess now I'm just old and dumb! ha ha ha. Some friends from church took me out for dinner and a movie on Friday night. That was really cool. I had fun.

Have some pictures that I want to post....when I get a computer. Which may be some time soon, like in January - so watch out. Until then, I'll be living my life vicariously through my friends on Facebook whom I can chat with on my phone. Sort of. And I don't have to pay for texting. Yeah, pretty awesome!

Well, I hope to write some more before my cousin leaves and takes his laptop of happiness from me...till then, this is Old Dawg Hamilton, signing off.

wow

2008-12-03T10:54:00.000-07:00

I know most of you know this, but God is just awesome! I recently moved to Queen Creek, AZ. I moved in with my aunt. I have my own room now people.

This is big.

Its a little farther from everything but, my own space sure is nice. :)

So, many of you know about Bert. Bert was a friend of mine about 7 years ago until I had him whacked. Its true. He was a cyst and he was big and he was on my fallopian tube. He met his end on an operating table in Nov. 2001.
Now, For the last 5 months, I've thought perhaps Bert had a brother. I'd been having some of the same symptoms as before, and so they started testing me for another cyst. My friend Lynette from church prayed that God would touch my body, and I thought that was nice. I go in for an ultrasound, and there was nothing. I was curious, but knew that the pain would be starting in a few days as it had the last 5 months, and maybe then I could better tell he Dr. where it hurt. She sent me for a CT scan, just to be safe, as well as had bloodwork and all that done, too. I went in yesterday. CT scan was clear and even my cholesterol and bloodwork was normal and everything! Then, I realized - I didn't have the pain this month. At all!

We didn't pray about my cholesterol-but God took care of it. I'm healthy and its because of Him! Praise God!!

Annoying my Dog

2008-11-17T21:23:00.004-07:00

I don't know why - but its so much fun to annoy my dog. Just see what I mean...

Veterans Day

2008-11-11T14:23:00.003-07:00

A hearty thank you to every Veteran. There are no words that could say thank you enough.

nothing new

2008-11-08T18:16:00.002-07:00

Not much new going on around here.

Of course the minute I typed that - like 3 or 4 things came to mind....of course they did. :)

One, my mom had surgery this past Tuesday. She had a cervical fusion meaning they fused some of the vertabrae in her neck together. My dad had this exact same surgery a few years ago. On the exact same vertabrae! They're weird. Anyway, everything turned out good, praise God!

Speaking of God - how good is He? I was reading through John 6 this week (and to be quite honest - I hadn't read anything in a while) It was talking about a group of people that had followed Jesus across the lake (after he walked on water). This group of people asked him to show them a miracle and they would believe in him. Not only that - they said, "Moses sent bread from heaven, why don't you do that, and we'll believe." Okay...the DAY BEFORE Jesus fed the 5000. Did they forget already? It was not even 24 hours after that they were asking him for, not another sign, but the EXACT SAME sign he had just given them. Made me think about how I do the same thing. I watch God do something amazing in my life one minute, and the next I'm asking him to prove himself to me. He shines a light on my path one moment, and the next I ask him to show me again. Why? I can't answer that. If I knew I guess I wouldn't be doing it. Sigh. So, I was thinking about how patient, and loving God would have to be to love people like me. Oh well, at least I know I am a work in progress, right?! :)

In other news, I had an appointment today with the National Saftey Council's Defensive Driving School. Yeah. Did I mention that on my camping trip a few weeks ago I got one of those photo radar tickets. Yeah, well, I did. $210! Tell me about it, right? So rather than pay the ticket you can "choose" to go to this class....for $165! Oh well, I did it, and its done. Learned some stuff too. Like I probably shouldn't be Facebooking from my phone while driving on the freeway during rush hour....

Okay, okay!

2008-11-01T16:16:00.003-07:00

T minus 2 hours and counting.....

2008-10-30T22:29:00.003-07:00

...until its technically and officially Halloween. Not that I enjoy the pagan-ness of the day so much, but definately dressing up.

I completed the shirt tonight. I sewed it myself. Yeah, you can tell....but its WAY cooler than a store bought one - AND I can say I made it.

I haven't pieced together the entire ensemble yet...never anything like the last minute, huh? Anyway, here is the shirt (sewn on a machine that some wonderful friends let me use!).

Have a fun and safe Halloween!

Two things...

2008-10-26T16:12:00.003-07:00

Two things:
1. Tomorrow will be 15 years that I've been a Christian. Officially half my life. And you know - I feel like I am in a good spot spiritually. There is always things to work on, but I think compared to where I was this time last year - its a definite improvement. A little update on the stronghold (click here) I've talked about... I'm at 33 days without engaging in that sin. God is SO amazing! I can't even begin to describe it...

2. Recently I transferred offices at my work. I now work in Tempe and am saving about 50-60 minutes a day on the road. Time I could use to sleep, or blog, or eat.... you know, something better than just driving. One of my new friends from the new office invited me out to see a band play on Friday night. It was fun. Somehow I ended up on the dance floor. No, alcohol was not a factor. Though, if I HAD been drinking, I may have had better moves....

This is Barb, Sara, and I... Sara (middle) is my friend from work, and Barb is Sara's friend...well, my friend too, now. :) I think we had fun. The band was awesome and I wasn't even upset when they played country music! (LOVED The Devil Went Down to Georgia...) So, yep.

Okay, I should have titled this three things....but the Jack Sparrow costume is nearing completion. I'm in the final stages now folks....

Most women don't want to look like Mutants

2008-10-17T06:41:00.005-07:00

I'm getting pretty darn tired of certain people (Elaina) making mention that perhaps I shouldn't wear flip flops in public. You know, just because my feet may not be as PERFECT as someone elses feet....just because I need to use lotion and someone elses feet probably have a PERFECT blend of natural oils and moisturizers.....just because my toes have hairy knuckles and someone elses toes are smooth as a baby's bottom.....just because YOU have all your toe nails and I have knubby stubs....well, okay - you got me on that one.

No, those aren't my thumbs....they're my big toes. And, no you're eyes don't deceive you - I don't have toenails on my big toes. They were removed in college by a doctor who told me, (as he's ripping the toenail off) "Most women don't want to look like mutants..." Well, I'm not most women. Thanks for that, by the way, Dr. Offutt (get it....off it! ha ha ha).

Yes, my other toes have their toenails. Yes, I will still wear flip flops. If that offends you (Elaina) then just be glad you live a state away. I am looking for a circus side show that I might possibly be a part of...that'd be cool.

Eek!

2008-10-13T17:46:00.000-07:00

Okay so I'm driving home from the store and I look down and there is a freaking spider on my flippin foot! I was wearing flip flops and I'm pretty sure I felt all 8 of his creepy litte legs crawling around on me... Needless to say I may have freaked out a bit. My little eight legged friend lost his life there on the side of the road

Camping 2008

2008-10-12T13:55:00.004-07:00

I am back from a much needed camping trip. Its hard to believe that the last time I went camping was back in 2004 with Tara and Laura at Eleven Mile Reservoir in Colorado. This time I went with some great people from my church, Bryan and Lynette Durrett and their family. We went to Woods Canyon Lake, which - cooincidentally is where I used to go with my family when I was little. A great time was had by all, I do believe. Even though the last night there was a high wind advisory and none of us got much sleep due to our tents being whipped about. It was cold - and it reminded me of how places other than Phoenix actually have cool temperatures. :) I didn't take very many pictures, but here are a couple.

Me taking a picture of Lynnette taking a picture of.....

Bryan gettin the grill ready for dinner...

Woods Canyon Lake

We hiked around the lake. They had said, "Oh we're just gonna take a little walk around the lake..." I'm not a hiker. Well, I'm not a GOOD hiker....anyway....I did it......now I can check hiking off my Bucket List (well, I'll put in ON my Bucket List first and THEN check it off)

Tearing down camp with the Durretts

Loading up...

2008-10-06T06:28:00.003-07:00

Pirate gun (updated and cool-i-fied) - Check

Bandana (made from an old pillowcase purchased at Goodwill) - Check

Fabric belt...thing (made from an old sheet-also purchased at goodwill) - Check

Dreadlocks (made from yarn) - Check

Pirate Boots (that my big ol' calves wouldn't fit into so I had to slice open the back of the boots to allow for the vastness of my leg girth....) - Check

Pattern to make the shirt and vest (yes, you heard me right - MAKE the shirt and vest) - Check

I'm getting close, everyone. My mom is going to be a whoopie cushion - complete with a remote control noise maker...its pretty cool.

We are having a Harvest Festival at my church. Its going to be fun! I've talked Noelle into coming (who, by the way, either wants to be an Asia Girl (Geisha) or a Diva...) and so now the entire family is going to be coming. Its sort of like the famous phrase, "The family that Trick-or-Treats together, may ultimlately come to the saving knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ together." Or something like that.

One Year

2008-09-30T22:13:00.002-07:00

Can you believe its been a year since I've been in AZ? For those of you who thought I'd never make it through the summer - I nearly didn't! Praise GOD that I'm still alive and not completely melted (slightly melted, but not completely).

Anyway, there have been some awesome things that happened this year. God has had to work overtime on me. There was a lot of junk that he and I had to work through. And we did. And we still are. And we always will.....I'm sure. Its amazing to me how faithful he really is. I mean, seriously. If I were him, I'd have counted me out years ago. But he doesn't. He never will. How awesome.

He brought me to a job where I can literally impact peoples lives every day. I spoke to a young woman yesterday whose 2 1/2 year old daughter had just been diagnosed with Hodgkins Disease. I was able to be an ear...thats all she needed right then. I told her I would pray for her. Thank you Lord, you know? Even though my job can be stressful, and sad, and discouraging I am right where I need to be.

I think the best part of this year has been finding my 'home' at Desert Springs Church. I know, I know, I talk about this place all the time. Trust me, if you had been through some of the things that I went through at church - you'd talk about this church all the time too! I mean, all churches have their issues, and I'm certainly not saying they are perfect by any means. I really can't describe it. Its a freeing place. Its a delivering place. I've heard it described as a hospital for the sick - and that is really what it is. I had some wounds when I came in, and now those are healing and I'm ready to start finding others who are wounded and bring them in, too. You know? Anyway, that little paragraph doesn't do what God has done in me through this church justice. I've had a couple of old friends call in the last few weeks and they have said, "Wow, you sound happy again." Praise God. I am happy. I found my home.

Costume Gun - Before and After

2008-09-28T19:57:00.005-07:00

My mom says I'm spending too much time on this costume. I say - whatever, I don't care. I was up until almost midnight the other night turning this boring pirate gun...

into this....

Argh matey!

Strongholds

2008-09-26T06:02:00.009-07:00

Stronghold
–noun
1. a well-fortified place; fortress
2. a place that serves as the center of a group, as of militants or of persons holding a controversial viewpoint
3. a place of survival or refuge

Stronghold. Its a word that many times Christians use to describe sin. Something that has become so embedded in our life that we no longer know how to get rid of it. If you've read here for very long you'll know I've talked about certain strongholds in my life. One in particular I have dealt with for years. Many, many years. In that time walls have been built up around that area of my life. Big, thick walls. Stone ones. There's probably even a moat with crocodiles surrounding the thing. Its become a stronghold. A fortress. I have told God, "God, you can have my life - I'm giving it freely to you." Yet this stronghold remains. This sin struggle remains. Guilt, shame, discouragement. It all remains. Why? I've thought all this time that I am the one who built this stronghold. That stone by stone, I'm the one who labored and made the walls and the moat, because of my sin. For one, I would hope that I would not have willingly build such a fortress around a known sin in my own life. Truthfully, I don't know if I'm strong enough to have even done that. But I know who is. I know of someone who would like nothing more than to build walls like that around my sin. Our enemy. Our nemesis. Satan. He is the one who lugged these stones in here. He is the one that I myself allowed to dig a moat and entrench himself in this area of my life. He has made himself well fortified in that area.

Something stuck out to me as I read about strongholds. I was thinking about the enemy making himself a stronghold, making himself a place where he can go in our life that no matter what its safe. Maybe its an addiction that we have that we have given to God, but haven't really given to him. Satan knows that is an area that he is safe in. Its a stronghold for him. The mighty fortress that Satan has built is nothing compared to the stronghold the bible says we have.

Psalm 9:9 The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.
Psalm 18:2 The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.
Psalm 27:1 The LORD is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life— of whom shall I be afraid?
Psalm 37:39 The salvation of the righteous comes from the LORD; he is their stronghold in time of trouble.

The Lord is my stronghold. He is the place where I can go and be safe. The enemy can't go there. He is not allowed within its walls. Does that mean we won't have to battle? We won't have to fight to keep Satan out. No, I don't think so. 2 Corinthians 10:4 says, "The weapons we fight with (so, we have weapons, and we're fighting) are not of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power (power that comes from God) to demolish strongholds." Now, God wouldn't give us weapons that could destroy HIS stronghold. So what strongholds would he be talking about? The same one I'm talking about - the enemy's. The passage goes on, in verse 5, "We demolish areguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." Guys, we are in the midst of a war. An actual, literal war. Our lives are the battleground. The enemy has a stronghold in my life where he feels he is safe. No more. NO MORE! No longer will I allow Satan any inch of ground in my life. Its over. It stops here. Satan's stronghold will crumble. Stone by stone - its going to fall. The only stronghold I need or want in my life is the one where I can run to and be safe.

Halloween 2

2008-09-19T06:04:00.003-07:00

Okay, I've made my decision..........

Yeah....this is what I was doing last night....should have been practicing for worship tonight....eh, what can you do...

You shall see the full effect October 31.

Who decides...

2008-09-17T22:54:00.001-07:00

Who decides that guys can have hairy legs and armpits, but that girls should shave theirs?

A Grandpa Story

2008-09-14T21:52:00.002-07:00

My mom, my aunt and my grandma basically took care of my grandpa in the weeks before his death. My mom told me this story that happened just a few days before he died.

Hy mom and Grandpa were in his bedroom doing something and Grandpa said, "Now, Liz, there is a gun and magazine (clip) under the bed. I don't want Aimee to come in here while she is playing and get a hold of it." My grandpa was thinking I was still a child. He was suffering from terminal dementia my mom called it. When they asked him the date he replied March 1985. I would have been 7.

"Okay, dad," my mom said and she lifted the mattress to look for the gun.

"UNDER the bed, Liz UNDER the bed. Would you listen to me?!" cried my grandpa.

So my mom climbed down on her hands and knees and looked not expecting to find anything, but sure enough there was a pistol and the magazine clip under the bed.

Just wanted to remember that story later, so I posted it here. :)

In over my head?

2008-09-09T22:40:00.002-07:00

I'm not a quitter. When I say I'm going to do something - generally I do it. (Unless its the gym - yeah that lasted like 3 days). Tonight I started a 2 year bible/leadership course at my church. I'm pretty excited. I was pretty excited. Well, I'm still pretty excited, its just that - I don't know what I'm doing there. I'm not planning on being in any form of leadership any time soon. Some of the people in the class have been in ministry, are currently in ministry....want to be in ministry. I guess we're all called to be ministers, but..... Why did I sign up? Thats what I said! No really, I had heard about it a while ago and thought, Wow, that is something I'd like to do. This summer I decided I would try to go back to college and that I wouldn't have time for this course. Well, school fell through and I felt like God said, "Now you have the time. I want you to do this." I sure hope that was him and that I'm not doing this to fulfill some selfish desire to complete this course just to complete it.....anyway. Well, the first thought I had as we're sort of going through the introductions is that, Man, I am SO out of place. I wanted to quit. Sorry, I've made a mistake - have a good year. SEE YA SUCKA'S!!! I won't do that, but its what I was thinking. Anyway - I'm still excited about it. I am pretty sure everyone in the class is married....and I'm single. Thats ok. I don't care. (I probably wouldn't have metioned it if I REALLY didn't care, huh?) I'm not going to quit. I quit the gym, thats enough for this month.

I don't know - you choose the title....

2008-09-07T17:38:00.003-07:00

I'm sure I'm not the first one to come up with this "new" thought. Sometimes I have to "choose" to feel or act a certain way, even if I don't really feel that way. Case in point (and I apologize in advance to any male readership - you know who you are...) you know "that week" during "that time" of the month? Well, as I get older I'm finding I'm getting more and more emotional during that time. Not all crying and boo-hooing either. No, one day I'll be sad, but then the next I'll be very annoyed, and then I'll be very angry, and then I'll be depressed, and then I'll finally figure out what week it is, and I'll calm down (a little). Can I hear an AMEN?! Or, another case in point - shyness. Okay, I call some of my recent behavior being shy. You know, standing back and watching group interactions from a distance. Being in a group, but not being a part of the group. Not wanting to stretch myself enough to actually reach out and make new friends. I call it shy, God calls it something else. Pride? Stuck-up-iveness... I think I've said I'm shy because that makes me feel better about not talking to anyone at church or work.

You know, I can be so stinking selfish, too. That is one thing I really want to work on. Something I really need to work on. I tell myself that I am entitled to these feelings and that I can act in whatever manner I choose. But I can't. I just can't. Not only is it not fair to my friends, but my life is supposed to be a living testimony to those around me. To those closest to me. To those who need to see Him through me, because they're not going to see Him anywhere else. I have to keep myself in check, you know?

God was impressing that on me this morning. How can I be a living testimony and I have an attitude, or I'm depressed, or I'm fill in the blank. THEN, once I am a testimony and someone asks about God, how am I supposed to respond if I haven't even been in His word the last week? *sigh* Okay, so back to my initial thought: Sometimes I have to "choose" to feel or act a certain way, even if I don't really feel that way. I may feel shy - but God says that he has not given us a spirit of timidity. I may feel depressed or down - but God says rejoice in the Lord always.

DISCLAIMER: Oh, one last thought - I'm totally not saying that we should suppress our feelings or anything like that. I'm saying that personally I have a tendency to let my emotions control me - and for ME, these are things I, myself need to work on.

Grandpa - William Gill

2008-09-04T06:16:00.005-07:00

Four months ago, while I was in Colorado for Memorial Day, my grandfather, Bill Gill, was playing golf and threw out his back. While at the doctor it was discovered that he hadn't actually thrown out his back, but rather he had cancer in his bones, lungs and liver.

He lost his battle with the disease yesterday morning. He was 75 years old.

Please pray for my family (my mom, aunt and uncles and grandmother specifically) during this time. Thank you so much.

Halloween

2008-09-01T20:13:00.002-07:00

Okay, before you start lecturing me on how sinful Halloween is....I know. I really do. I'm still dressing up, though. For those who feel I'm sinning....pray for me (I need it).

I want to be something really cool. I really REALLY want to be Jack Sparrow....but I haven't gotten up the courage to dress like a man in front of people at my church. (I assume we are having a Harvest festival....I haven't heard yet) Even still - thats the coolest thing I can come up with. I don't have my Jedi costume anymore, though I am not against making another one.

What do you think I should be? I really want something different....like me.

Discuss.

Beth Moore Videos

2008-08-28T05:24:00.006-07:00

Okay, so this clip is from the Siesta Fiesta - the question: What was your most difficult parenting situation with your girls when they were younger?

Here is another clip from the Fiesta and the question is: What music is on your iPod?

Hmmm

2008-08-26T06:21:00.002-07:00

Why is it that when we are caught up doing something we shouldn't be doing, we wait for someone we don't even know to tell us something we already do know, when all the time the One who does know already said No.

Texas Photos, video and more!

2008-08-25T19:26:00.003-07:00

Erika, Lily and I

Me and Erika

Again....

Lilybug

Amanda, Beth, Melissa

This was one of about ten of these sized group photos taken. I'm the one who stands out like a sore green thumb!

A group shot....can you see me?

There I am!

Lastly, here is the video of the thunderstorm I saw from the plane. Obviously the video does not do it justice at all... **okay just watched the video - SO not as good as the real thing was...**

Living Proof Live

2008-08-25T06:23:00.002-07:00

Hey All - I am writing this out long have on the plane coming home from San Antonio TX. I was there for 2 reasons this weekend. One was to visit my friend and college roommate, Erika Gray. I had not seen her in over 4 years and hadn't seen her daughter Lily since she was 2 months old. She is now a beautiful 4 1/2 year old who can actually READ! She was pretty much potty trained at like 6 months old (ask Erika....I still don't know how she did that) Anyway it was really good to see Erika and Lily.

The other reason I went to San Antonio was for a Living Proof Live event. As a blogger, this was an extra special event for me. I may have mentioned Beth Moore's blog in previous posts before (its on my side bar under Other Places I Visit). Anyway on their blog Betha nd her daughters, Amanda and Melissa write about faith, life and whatever comes to mind. Those who frequent the blog Beth calls siestas (go to the site to see why...) So this weekend they decided to pair the Living Proof Live event with a blogger event called the Siesta Fiesta. There were probably 1000 bloggers there. We got to take some group photos with Beth and her daughters and it was SO refreshing to see how down to earth and "normal" they are...

I'll have to speak more about what Beth talked about at the Living Proof Live event later - I still need to process it all myself.

There was a cool lightning storm that I could see from the plane tonight. I'm going to post a video of it - if it came out. :)

Here I am!!

2008-08-22T09:22:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm in San Antonio! I'm staying here with Erika Gray who was my roommate in crime - wait no, in college...yeah, that's it! We stayed up lsst night until nearly 3:00am catching up and reminiscing...

Tonight is the first night of the Beth Moore conference and I'm REALLY excited. Erika can't go, so I'll be there solo. Still great fun.

I'm posting from my phone and can't post pictures here till I get home but I am remembering how my hair and humidity don't mesh well (insert frizzy headed picture here)

More to come!

I'm on my way

2008-08-21T03:30:00.002-07:00

Well everyone, this is it. I'm leaving this evening for the Siesta Fiesta held in San Antonio TX. While there I'm going to also be visiting with Erika, one of my closet an oldest friends. Anyway - Its 3:30 am right now...I haven't packed. I hate mornings, but wanted to give this short little update.

I'm going to be sending pictures from the road on Facebook, so if you're on - check it out. If not - JOIN! :)

Random thoughts

2008-08-04T19:50:00.002-07:00

So, I took the plunge tonight. I did. I didn't even plug my nose before diving in.... I joined a gym! My church had a fundraiser for the youth where you could get 3 months for $20 (and a deal at that!!) I signed up for a year.....so if I'm still going strong in 4 months - I'll want a prize! :) Yeah, yeah, yeah, being able to see my own toes will be prize enough...

Another bit of information - I'm going to see Beth Moore in San Antonio, TX in like 2 1/2 weeks! I'm so excited. I've meet a ton of people on her blog and there is going to be a special section at the conferece for all the bloggers to go. I'm totally excited. PLUS, I'll get to see Erika and her daughter Lily whom I haven't seen in about 4 years. Oh, and if Erika asks, I'm going to see HER not Beth Moore.... :)

Our church had their grand opening this weekend, and it was amazing! It really was! You could really feel the presence of God in that place.

Umm, I guess thats it. Hope you're doing well!!!

This is home

2008-07-27T15:28:00.002-07:00

I visited Colorado Springs back in May. I had been looking forward to it for weeks. I had to be at the airport very early...I left my house at 3:30 am to get there (and I still almost missed the plane...) Not only would I be seeing some old friends from the Springs, but Yatron and Pastor Weatherly were going to be there and I hadn't seen them since they left Detroit last August.

If you know me at all, you know I'm barely functioning in the morning. Don't like the mornings, never will. So this particular morning I'm driving to the airport and turn on the radio (to keep me awake) and the song that comes on is called, This is Home, by Switchfoot. If I hadn't been running late I would have pulled over, cause that song hit me that morning.

I've been in AZ for about 10 months, now. Since I've been in here, I've thought about the good 'ol days. Whether its back in college in Alamosa, Colorado and hanging out with friends from church and school there. Or being in Colorado Springs and hanging out with everyone from Compassion and church there. I've even thought back to Detroit and how, even though it didn't end up well for me in Detroit, I still had a family of believers that I could call if I needed to. I think that is why I was so excited to go to Colorado Springs, that weekend. I wanted to get back to the good 'ol days. I hadn't heard this song before that morning. Maybe it wouldn't have affected me so strongly if I had. I realized that I can't go back to how it was. People change, they move, they grow up, they grow apart. Lives go on, cities change, plans change. Maybe I haven't settled in here yet, but thats mostly my fault. I've gotten shy in my old age (some of you can't believe it - others can...). Blah, blah, blah, anyway, all that is to say that I know that God brought me to Arizona. He directed me to my church and gave me a job. He's asking me to lean on him for everything, right now. I'm going to do it, too... Really, I am. I have no other choice. I know he loves me, and I know he has only the best in store for me. I am not going to dwell on the past, and wish things were like they used to be. The truth is when I left Alamosa, Colorado Springs, and Detroit - I was SO READY to leave. I wasn't happy there. Each new place I go I think, "Man, things were so good in Alamosa..." I'm SUCH an Israelite in that sense. I would rather go back into slavery then spend time, free, in the wilderness. Okay, I blah blah'ed like 5 sentences ago, and I'm still talking. I'm done. Here are the lyrics to the song. If you haven't heard it yet, listen to it.

This is Home - Switchfoot
I’ve got my memories
Always inside of me
But I can’t go back
Back to how it was

I believe now
I’ve come too far
No I can’t go back
Back to how it was

Created for a place I’ve never known
This is home
Now I’m finally Where I belong
Where I belong
Yeah, this is home
I’ve been searching
For a place of my own
Now I’ve found it
Maybe this is home
Yeah, this is home

Belief over misery
I’ve seen the enemy
And I won’t go back
Back to how it was

And I got my heart Set on What happens next
I got my eyes wide It’s not over yet
We are miracles And we’re not alone

Yeah This is home
Now I’m finally
Where I belong
Where I belong
Yeah, this is home

I’ve been searching
For a place of my own
Now I’ve found it
Maybe this is home
Yeah, this is home

And now after all My searching
After all my questions I’m gonna call it home
I got a brand new mindset
I can finally see
The sunset
I’m gonna call it home
Home

Arizona.....

2008-07-18T05:49:00.001-07:00

The time is now 5:49 in the morning. The temperature outside is 92 degrees...at 5:49 in the morning...

What else is there to say?

Letting it Go

2008-07-08T20:14:00.005-07:00

I have a talented dog. You might remember a post several months ago where she is showing off a new trick (click here to see it). Anyway, in this video is my dog and her ball. She wants me to throw her the ball, but she won't give it to me... well, you'll see...

This is my dog Babe. She is pretty annoying most of the time - but we still love her. She is never far from one of her tennis balls, and someone is always throwing it for her. Her big thing is that she wants you to take the ball from her. You can't just have a nice game of fetch with Babe, you have to wrestle that ball from her, and she will not let it go until SHE is ready for you to have it. In the video, when I pretended like I didn't want the ball, she put it down. The instant I went to get it, though she picked it right back up and wouldn't let me have it. And so we play this game over, and over, and over AND OVER each and every night!!! Sigh......I do love that dog, though...

I was thinking about that today and thought, man, that is SO how I am with God. There are things in my life that I have asked, begged, pleaded, bargained and prayed for God to take out of my life - and He hasn't. I've told myself I don't know why He hasn't taken these things from me, but I DO. I know why. I'm not giving it to Him. I want to give it to Him. Right now, at this very moment, typing this I want Him to have every part of my life. But later, maybe tomorrow...maybe the next day I'm going to want to take those areas of my life back from Him. Like Babe with the ball, I want Him to take it from me. I'm saying, "Here God, I want you to have this part of me that I've never given you before," and then when He goes to take it, I won't let go. I hold on to that thing like that ball of Babe's. God doesn't want to wrestle things out of our lives. He wants us to give it up freely to Him. He wants us to WANT to give it to Him, and then leave it with Him.

The sin in our lives is just that: sin IN our lives. I am a child of GOD who has sin IN her life. (bear with me, but I'm about to use ANOTHER analogy...) Okay, lets say you have a bowl of Potato Cheese soup (the best soup out there, if I may say so myself). Now, lets say I put some pepper in that soup - does it then become Pepper Potato Cheese soup? No, its just Potato Cheese soup with some pepper IN it. Or what if something weird happened....like a bug flew into the soup. Is it now Potato and Bug Cheese soup? Eewwww, but no, its soup with a bug in it. I know it sounds sort of dumb, but that is how we (or at least I) view myself in Christ. I am not a Sinning Child of God. I am a child of God who has sin IN her life. If I never conquer the sin in my life - I will STILL be a Child of God. Nothing will change that. What I do is not who I am. I have to remember that. I HAVE to remember that. I cannot live the life God has intended for me to live with the thought in the back of my mind that I am not good enough to live it. If not for God's grace, His mercy, His unfailing love for us - where would any of us be?

Wow

2008-06-27T06:15:00.004-07:00

Okay, I got goosebumps after this. It is really good and you ALL should watch it! (thanks Holly!!)

I might have teared up a little too, but don't tell anyone...

when God speaks

2008-06-22T17:59:00.003-07:00

So, I was supposed to write this post on Friday...but I didn't, sorry.

Do you ever wake up in the morning with a song in your head? Or while you're doing something in the middle of the day you realize there is a song in your head that you haven't heard in a while? And you think, Hmm, why is THAT song in my head, I haven't heard it in a while... (mind you, I'm not talking about having the last song you listened to in your car on your way to work, or the song that woke you up on your clock radio...this is a random song that I haven't heard for a while...). Well, I've learned to listen to these songs that seem to get stuck in my head from nowhere because several times the particular song that is stuck in my "coincedentally" speaks to whatever it is that I may be going through at that time. I think it is a way that God tries to speak to me when He knows that I won't be diving into the Word... (which is awesome in itself, that he speaks to me in my disobedience)

All that to say, this happened to me Friday. This is a song by Relient K called, I So Hate Consequences. I love Relient K - they're pretty darn awesome....anyway. I was singing this song in my cube for about 10 minutes before I realized that maybe God was speaking to me through it. Here is the part that was stuck in my head:

When I got tired of running from you
I stopped right there to catch my breath
There your words they caught my ears
You said, “I miss you son. Come home”
And my sins, they watched me leave
And in my heart I so believed
The love you felt for me was mine
The love I’d wished for all this time
And when the doors were closed
I heard no I told you so’s
I said the words I knew you knew
"Oh God, Oh God I needed you
God all this time I needed you, I needed you"

And I so hate consequences
And running from you is what my best defense is
I hate these consequences
Cause I know that I let you down
And I don't wanna deal with that

I'm humbled that God chooses to speak to me when I hadn't spoken to Him. That he doesn't give up on me when I want to give up on him. And that he loves me too much to let me fall to far away from him.

How does God speak to you?

Faith part 3

2008-06-13T12:41:00.000-07:00

Okay all. You know - I have to say this. I fear that the majority of my Christian experience has been based on emotion. You know - like, worshipping God at church when the music is just right and I have the tinglies. Oh I sure know how to come to Him when I am in despair or having an anxious moment. But what about now? Things are going pretty good for me right now (well aside from this crisis of faith). My prayer life falls off durong these times. Why? Because I don't feel I need anything from God right now. I have this desire to know more about God, yet don't really feel like spending time in His word. Yeah I know that the way to get to know someone is by spending time with them and that the same holds true for God. Just because I don't physically feel the goosebumps on my arms when I pray, doesn't mean he is not there. Just because perhaps I don't get all riled up in church like perhaps I have in the past doesn't mean that God has somehow left or His presence has left me or that He doesn't love me...His word is true whether I feel it or not. Its true whether I believe it or not. And you know what - I'm going choose to believe it whether I like it or not!

Believing God

2008-06-11T07:53:00.000-07:00

Okay real quick:
At the suggestion of someone I've started reading Beth Moore's Believing God. I really want to share an excerpt with you that I read yesterday:

"If you want to be full of faith, don't argue with a legalist! Love them. Serve side by side with them if God wills. Don't judge them. And don't argue with them! Unbelief is highly contagious. Nothing is logicals about miracles. To the degree that we debate matters of faith, we could find ourselves drained of it. We are not called to debate faith but to do it. To be nouns turned into verbs. Presently. Actively.
Keep seeking. Keep believing. I am convinced that the pure-hearted, faith-filled petitioner is going to behold a miracle. Whether lesser or greater, temporal or eternal, wonder never cease.

Faith - Part 2

2008-06-09T20:58:00.003-07:00

You know - in the Bible there are many, many times when a prohpet or teacher was relaying a message to the people and when they did so, often times they would begin by telling of what God had done for them in the past. I think in my current situation - I need to do that for myself. I'm posting it here so that there is no question to me (or anyone else, for that matter) that God 1. exists and 2. that he absolutely is who He says He is.

What God has Done for Me
1. I survived my birth even with being born blue, having no amniotic fluid when the doctor went to break the water, and not knowing how to eat on my own.
2. God has kept me in at least 2 cases that I am aware of from possibly being kidnapped.
3. He has kept me from harm in 3 car accidents.
4. He revealed himself to me when I absolutely needed him to.
5. He has never left me without earthly friendships.
6. He protected me in Detroit when there was gunfire a few houses from where I was standing - outside, alone and at night...
7. He has kept me through 2 surgeries
8. He has always kept a roof over my head and food on my table.
9. He protected me when my apartment was broken into in Detroit
10. He protected me in Alamosa when I thought my apartment had been broken into.
11. He protected me the COUNTLESS times I slid in my car on icy roads.
12. He protected me in several instances where common sense would have told others to get out of there...and I didn't
13. He provided a doctor who treated me on an ongoing basis in Alamosa for free.
14. He kept me safe from online predators.

I know I could keep going...but I don't know if I need to. I think its pretty clear. As I was typing this a verse came to mind:

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
2 Cor. 4:8,9

How true, huh? We ARE hard pressed on EVERY side. We have bills, jobs, kids, worries, anxieties, fears, doubts, and all that before lunch! So we are hard pressed, but you know what - we are NOT crushed. To me that means that while we struggle with things like lacking faith, it is NOT going to be the end. Some of you who have left comments (thank you, by the way) have said that its normal to question God - He expects it almost. Oh to have the childlike faith that I used to have when I was....well, a child.

Okay, I'm beginning to ramble...I am a bit tired, I suppose.................*snore*

Faith

2008-06-02T05:28:00.004-07:00

Have you ever driven around for a few days with the gas light on in your car? You figure, I can go for another day or so - but actually running out of gas is a constant threat. Well, friends, let me tell you something - my gas light has been on for a while now - I just don't know where to go to fill up. I'm talking about faith, and truthfully, I could use your help here.

Okay, please let me start by saying that I am not ready to throw in the towel, or give up on this whole Christianity thing. Far from it. I've been dealing with this area of faith for a while now - and and seeking advice from you.

So, what is faith? Dictionary.com defines faith as: 1. confidence in a person or thing; 2. belief that is not based on proof. Belief that is not based on proof - ouch. I'm one of those people who wants proof (not that knowing what the Lord has done for me isn't proof enough...). I want to see it to believe it. Anyway - I digress - so, what does the bible say about faith?

Hebrews 1:1-3 "1Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. 2This is what the ancients were commended for. 3By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God's command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible."

2 Cor. 5:7 says "We live by faith, not by sight."

Heb 1:6 "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. "

I thought there was a verse that said something like, "To each one he gave a measure of faith." I can't find that verse. It may not exist, but thats the one I'm trying to find.

Okay - here is what I'm asking. 1. Have you ever been where I'm at before? 2. How do you get more faith? 3. What are your ideas on this subject? Please let me know what you think - I'm going to research too. :) Thanks!

Pictures from the Springs

2008-05-29T18:58:00.004-07:00

Just got back from the Springs - had an awesome time. NO, I'm not moving back anytime soon......not saying I wouldn't like to, though, I'm just saying.... :)

Thought I'd update you with some pictures from the trip! I didn't get to take pictures with everyone (Sarah B, Sara D, Brenda...) but, these are the ones I DID get to take. It was really awesome to see everyone - and to not be at work for a few days!!

Janna - my old boss from Compassion.

You see why I love her so much?

Christie and I shared a cube when I first started at Compassion...

Oh Randy......got the scoop?

Haley - I taught her everything I know about Training...

Bill - You'll never find a truer friend.

Robyn - Be thankful I didn't post the OTHER picture Robyn and I took...

Mi Amiga - Elaina

Tara aka T-Mac

Me and Yatron

All in all - it was an awesome trip. I didn't get to see everyone for as long as I'd like to have. I guess thats just the way it goes, huh? I really do miss everyone. Its hard, even being here for 9 months, I still feel like I don't know that many people. Anyway - wanted to post these here for your viewing pleasure!

Oh, and for those of you who still wonder.....my total weight loss after the trip - 34 pounds!!!!! I'm down two pant sizes and one shirt size!!! Can you believe it? Me saying "No" to pasta, cheese, BREAD, cheese, regular soda......the list goes on and on..... Anyway, yeah, thats where I'm at right now! ;)

Jeremiah 3

2008-05-20T05:52:00.002-07:00

I've been reading through Jeremiah. I came across this passage yesterday, and I don't know that I've ever read anything like this before. (DISCLAIMER: I am sure I have read something that has touched me like this before....its just been a long time...)I don't even think I need to write about it - it speaks clearly for itself. This is from Jeremiah 3, out of the New Living Translation: enjoy.

19 “I thought to myself,
‘I would love to treat you as my own children!’
I wanted nothing more than to give you this beautiful land—
the finest possession in the world.
I looked forward to your calling me ‘Father,’
and I wanted you never to turn from me.
20 But you have been unfaithful to me, you people of Israel!
You have been like a faithless wife who leaves her husband.
I, the Lord, have spoken.”

21 Voices are heard high on the windswept mountains,
the weeping and pleading of Israel’s people.
For they have chosen crooked paths
and have forgotten the Lord their God.

22 “My wayward children,” says the Lord,
“come back to me, and I will heal your wayward hearts.”

“Yes, we’re coming,” the people reply,
“for you are the Lord our God.

The Sermon

2008-05-13T05:57:00.003-07:00

Here is the message from church on Sunday - see previous post to see why I'm posting this.. :)

You can listen to it online from my church website:
Becky's Message
Right click on it and save to your computer. :)

or you can go to our website and download the message from the church website:
Desert Springs Church Sermons

It takes several minutes to download either way, but trust me its so worth it...

If you can't get it to work - I'll send you by CD, so let me know!!

Faulty vision

2008-05-12T05:46:00.003-07:00

Evidentally at my church there is a tradition that on Mothers Day the pastors wife, Becky, will give the message. Most of the people I've talked to there have told me, "Make sure you bring tissues on Mothers Day," 'Yeah, okay,' I thought...

Have you ever been at church and thought, "I don't know why everyone else showed up for church today because this message was just for ME!" Yeah, thats awesome and it happened Sunday. Since I've not been at the church a full year, I had never heard Becky speak, and let me tell you - I feel blessed that God is allowing me to be a part of this church. We are going through a series right now entitled, Heroes - Ordinary people with extraordinary abilities. (Yes, its sort of based on the TV show Heroes.......man I love this church!) Becky spoke about sin and us and how God views us and our sin. She brought in her laundry (stay with me here, this is good) and talked about how she and Pastor Brad have different ways to sort the laundry. One does the laundry by specific colors: Blues, Browns, Yellows, etc. and the other does it by lights and darks. She said the one thing that neither of them do is wash everything together in one load. The darks stay with the darks and the lights stay with the lights. Always. This is how God views us and our sin. Separate. When God sees me, he sees me as who he created me to be. My sin is still there, but its in another pile. What we do is we continually lump our sin and our lives together and say, this is who I am. I'm this terrible person who does these terrible things. Its not. I am redeemed. That moment where I told God that I needed him and asked Jesus into my heart, the dirty laundry in my life was separated. Do I still sin? Yes. Does God still view me as a sinner? No. He sees me through his Grace Goggles. Through those goggles, I'm righteous and holy. Romans 6:21 says "so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." She even mentioned that when God talks about our sin he always says, "Your sin has separated you from God," not "because you're such a sinner..." He keeps us separate from our sin. May our prayers this week be that God would allow us to see ourselves the way He sees us, and not through the faulty vision of our own eyes.

I'm going to post the message here once it goes online. It will be here sometime this week. I encourage you to check back and listen to it.

Eeeks

2008-05-11T20:00:00.003-07:00

This is a lesson to myself........before applying make up....

and after.......

ALWAYS GO WITH THE AFTER!!!!! ALWAYS!

:)

p.s. if I had photoshop I'd look even better!!!!!

I'm coming to Colorado Springs...

2008-05-03T18:06:00.002-07:00

So evidentaly my coming to Colorado Springs for 1 day last month and not telling people that I was coming wasn't the best idea...SO-RRYYY!! Okay, well, I'm letting you know - ahead of time - that I will be in the Springs on May 23-27. My friends daughter is graduating from high school that weekend, so I thought I'd take some extra time and stay a while. So for those of you who like to leave town when I'm in town (Sarah) or who like to schedule plans then not show up (Brenda) or who don't read this blog (Tara) or who do read this blog (You) - you have been dutifully warned. My only plans so far are that I'm going to be at Compassion on that Friday the 23rd around lunch time. Please let me know if you are planning on coming. I also want to have lunch at my favorite place, Tsing Tao....probably Sunday, Monday or Tuesday (or each of those days!!) ;)

Now, don't complain.....you can't say you didn't know...unless you're Tara, because she already told me she doesn't read this blog....but other than that - no excuses!!

Yay or Nay

2008-04-29T19:15:00.005-07:00

For those of you who don't know, I am not one who typically dresses up at all, let alone in skirts....yet for some inexplicable reason, my latest excursion to the store has left me with two of them. I do have to dress up where I work, and so I thought a few skirts might be nice. Plus, you never know when you'll be invited to a wedding...

I am putting the photos here so you can tell me if I should keep them, or not. (NOT would be the preferred vote here.) Also, those of you with weak stomachs...please look away now....don't say I didn't warn you...

#1 Ensemble 1

#1 Skirt Close up

#2 Ensemble 2

#3 Random Weird Video Clip

Please Pray

2008-04-23T22:05:00.002-07:00

Hey all - please pray for my Grandpa. He was diagnosed this weekend with cancer, and its spread throughout his body. I can't imagine how that would feel, I know I'd be scared out of my mind, but I'm asking that you would be praying for him. The doctor hasn't given him a timeframe, he said he could live a week or he could live a year. Please pray also for my mom and aunt and 2 uncles as they deal with this difficult situation. I know there is a way for God to be glorified in it - pray for that to happen too. Even 100% healing!

Please also be lifting up the daughter of a lady from my bible study - I wrote about her before, Anna. She is scheduled for a very radical, very invasive surgery next week to remove most of her shoulder due to cancer. She will be left with little to no use of the arm. We know God can heal her - he healed her last year completely. The surgery is scheduled for May 2, I believe. You can read about it on her website at http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/annawilkerson.

Please be in prayer for both of these dear people!

Swimming

2008-04-17T20:15:00.003-07:00

I'm currently writing this while sitting in my bathing suit. Don't try to picture it......really don't. All day all I wanted to do was take a swim. A nice litte dip in the ol swimmin hole. I get home wtih thoughts of chlorine running through my head, and there she is - my 6 year old niece, Noelle. (I mean, yeah, I knew she'd be there - she lives here, but I wasn't thinking...) I can't "swim" with my niece. I can hold her and walk with her around the pool and let her jump in on me while I try to catch her. Thats not swimming, thats babysitting in water. I've been duped like this before, and it wasn't going to happen again. I'd just wait for her to go to bed, then I'd get in. 7:32 on the dot, I've got my swim suit, my towel and my brand new goggles - I'm all set. I go outside........ Now, remember - I live in Phoenix. It was supposed to be like 95 degrees here today. I go outside and its windy and chilly - and the pool is cold. I tried standing in the water knee deep to see if I could get used to it. Yeah right, so, now my feet are pruny, my legs are numb frmo the cold water, and I'm still sitting here in my bathing suit wondering if by some miracle the weather has changed and the water has warmed up in the 7 minutes its taken me to log on and write this blog. I'm smarter than that, right? I'll give it another 10 mintues. That should be good!

I don't even know what to call this one...

2008-04-15T21:39:00.003-07:00

I was getting ready to color my hair tonight, and decided to take a picture.....

How can one person be such a gi-normous nerd?

2008-04-13T21:29:00.006-07:00

I don't know. Maybe I was born like this. Maybe I learned it along the way. However I came by it - I have enough 'nerdity' to stretch around the world 3 and 3/4 times. Its true. Case in point: I was going through some pictures that I have on my computer and came across these. Mind you - I was alone, by myself when these first set of pictures were taken. And if that weren't pitiful enough, I was living in my parents basement at the time....

If you know what I'm dressed as.....I regret to tell you - you're a nerd too. Sorry...

Then there was the time I was just plain bored....

In case you're wondering - those are my pajama pants on the canines head.

I think that my all time favorite is this - I call it "Trapped Inside" I like to put it on as my parents desktop picture every now and again, just to freak them out:

The picture is big enough that you can set it as your desktop picture too - and have fun with it for years to come......

70th POST!!!!!!

2008-04-03T22:07:00.002-07:00

This is my 70th post, guys! Can you believe it? For those of you who continue to read (yes, BOTH of you) thank you for continuing to read. How pathetic would it be to write a blog once a week only to have no one read it?

Okay, so are you on the edge of your seat waiting to hear about the whole Weight Watchers thing? Well, its going well. I'm going to save the $13 per week right now and just weigh in at home, but tonight (after eating dinner, I might add) I weighed in.....the result? A total weight loss of 22 pounds!!! Granted, I've been sick for the last few days and not eating well....and its a new scale - but I sure like THIS scale better than the OTHER scale that I had to PAY to use! ;) Ahh, it feels good. I'm about 3 pounds away from my 10% goal from Weight Watchers, which means after 3 more pounds, I'll have lost 10% of my body weight from when I started! My pants are definately looser and so are my.....uh, you know.......bras.......had to buy new ones! At least I'm buying smaller ones now!

Lets see, what else? Work is good - crazy, but good. We had to sign some things saying that our stats are going to be at a certain place by the end of the month. I can do it - I have to do it. My job depends on it (literally!)

Church is going well. Our new building is opening in about a week. We're going to have an open house there this weekend after our service at the school. The people at this church are awesome, they really are. The pastor and his wife just genuinely care about people, and you can see it. I don't know - I love it. I'm happy that I'm at that church!

Okay, enough.....I think the antibiotics are making me talk and talk..........so, I'll talk again soon! Your turn to talk - write a comment!! :)

Circling the Drain

2008-04-01T17:03:00.001-07:00

Thats what my mom said when I asked her how she was feeling last week with her pneumonia. Thats how I feel today. Like I'm circling the drain of life, just waiting to be flushed in.....I have bronchitis. I feel like crap. But, on a lighter note, Guess what? My submission to Compassion’s Share Your Heart section is posted on their web site! Visit the Share Your Heart section to see what I shared.

Oh great.......

2008-03-29T18:53:00.002-07:00

I am not happy. A few weeks ago I posted about my blatant dislike for anything that flies. As a matter of fact, the very first post on this blog was about such an incident in my life. I don't like moths, flies, gnats, butterflies, flying beetles, birds (but thats a whole 'nother story), and bees. I found out today that Arizona has a problem with Africanized Bee's, more commonly known as killer bees. Anything that has the word "Killer" in their name disturbs me, but Killer Bees are things that horror movies are made of. They basically swarm you if you get to close and sting you until you die. Really nice. They actually have companies here whose sole purpose in existing is to remove killer bee colonies from peoples houses............ Let me reiterate....I am NOT happy right now.

Not better

2008-03-25T05:23:00.002-07:00

Okay - so my mom isn't over the pneumonia yet.....not as bad as it was, but still her work won't let her come back yet. Please pray for her, thanks!

:)

good days...

2008-03-20T10:14:00.000-07:00

So many cool things going on right now. 1. I'm currently at our administrative office going through the process to go from temp to permanent employee! Yay! That means I'll have insurance again! 2. I lost more weight this week for total weight loss of 18.6 ponuds - most 20!! 3. My mom is almost over her pneumonia (by the way - my mom has pneumonia...) 4. Our church building is nearly complete! 5. My aunt Katie is moving here this weekend (she is recently widowed). 6. Jesus is Risen!
Yeah - there are not so good things too - but let's focus on the good stuff!! Miss everyone!

Devil bug

2008-03-13T20:59:00.004-07:00

I love animals. I do - dogs, cats, rabbits, rats, snakes......sloths. I just love most of God's creatures. There are a few things God created that I am not too fond of. Pretty much anything with wings - but (those of you who know me can attest) I cannot stand....................... moths. I hate them. I wouldn't really say that I'm afraid of them, really. I know they can't hurt me - but just the thought of those little winged devil bugs is enough to make me want to shed my own skin. In Colorado, there are two months out of the year when we would get infested with moths. My 7th grade year was an especially bad year, and those suckers were everywhere! They'd fall out of the front door in the morning when you'd open the door (cause they were cold, and not warm enough to fly), they'd be in your car in the morning (even though there was not one in there when you got out of the car the night before). I swear, it was like one of the plagues of God, and it happened twice per year. They're Miller Moths, and we used to call them Killer Millers......that name didn't really help at all.... That was the one thing about Colorado that I hated. Well, I didn't know it didn't happen every where until I moved to Michigan. I remember driving down a mountain pass at night - seeing there was a moth in the car, and panicing because I couldn't pull over, and shaking when it would come near (right, Tara? Oh yeah, Tara said she doesn't read this blog....I can say whatever I want about her....maybe another post...) ANYWAY - after our womens bible study tonight I get out to my car....get inside....start 'er up.....and what do I see on my windshield wiper?

The Demon Beast from Hades! I swear he held on to that wiper for dear life - all while I'm driving 80 MPH just to get him to lose his grip. I think he had velcro on his little devil legs or something...anyway. I did risk my life (and the lives of countless others) by trying to capture a picture of him holding on WHILE I was driving 80 MPH.....but it didn't turn out. At some point in the journey one of the other demons must have needed him, because he just vanished....... You may think I'm exaggerating.....I'm not........

Well, maybe a little.

Week 6, I think..

2008-02-29T05:55:00.002-07:00

I think it is week 6 of weight watchers....I've sort of lost track...Anyway... this week was pretty good. Especially having been on vacation last week, and off the program a bit. So, for two weeks I lost (drum roll please) 3.8 pounds for a total weight loss of 15.6 pounds. Not too shabby, I reckon. See you Tuesday! :)

Why?

2008-02-26T05:56:00.002-07:00

Okay, so you all know that I have struggled with anxiety in the past. And a struggle that is in the past should STAY in the past. But, alas, here I am struggling with it again. There are some things going on at my work that is causing me to....well, I haven't had a full fledged freak out yet - but I'm close. Please be in prayer for me. Its too early to know what all is going to happen - but I really like this job and don't want to lose it!

Keep praying for Anna too (see next post)!! Thanks!

Prayer Request

2008-02-25T20:08:00.004-07:00

Hey there everyone,

I know I've told you all about my church, and how much I love it. Also I've written about my bible study. Well, one of the ladies in my bible study has an 11 year old daughter, Anna, who is fighting cancer. They are in Houston right now going through treatment. I am asking you if you would pray for Anna's healing and for her mom Dawna while they are away from the rest of their family. I am not sure why, but Anna's story has touched my heart so deeply from the moment I heard that the cancer was back. See God already healed Anna from this cancer last year, and in January, I believe, the tumor came back. We have out church praying for her, and I know they would appreciate all the prayers they can get!

Here is her website that is detailing what the family is going through right now. Thanks everyone!!

http://www.caringbridge.com/visit/annawilkerson

What a freak I am....

2008-02-24T17:19:00.003-07:00

Have you ever watched the Antiques Roadshow? When I lived in Detroit - for many months I didn't have cable - and so my favorite channel became PBS. Well the two shows I'd watch were History Detectives and Antiques Roadshow. Come to think of it - I didn't have cable in Colorado Springs, either...Dara and I used to watch Antiques Roadshow (we loved Leigh and Leslie Keno!). We loved it when someone who brought in something that I'd never even think to bring in...and the appraiser is like, "Well, the good thing about this piece is that even though it looks fake, I can tell its not..." You can see the owner going "cha-ching!" Or when the owner is all excited about some expensive piece that they bought and the appraiser goes, "Well, I see a few problems here in the dove tails...." or something like that. (okay, we didn't really enjoy watching peoples items turn out being fake or something...)

So, I'm at a garage sale a few weeks ago, and it was one of the last ones we were going to go to that morning, and I come across some paintings. I really liked them, the detail was incredible. I asked the lady how much she wanted for them - she wanted $50. I've never paid $50 for something that wasn't a gadget or something I could eat....but I really like these paintings. I talked her down to $40 for the paintings and I bought them! She had said they bought them in the 1970's in the Netherlands. Cool.

They are, I believe Oil on Board, and are signed by P.C. Steenhouwer. All I can find on the artist is that he was a Dutch painter that passed away in 1972. I thought I'd bring this all to your attention for one very important reason - they are filming Antiques Roadshow in Palm Springs in June and I have signed up for tickets. According to Google, Palm Springs is only 4 hours away. I'm such a freak. Mostly, I just want to go to see the Keno brothers....but it would be cool too learn more about these paintings. I won't know if I will get tickets until May. It does give me something to look forward to, at least. You too - I may be one of those people on the show where the appraiser says, "Well, unfortunately, there are some condition problems......"

Week 4

2008-02-22T05:17:00.002-07:00

Hey all - I realized (thanks to Becca) that my update for this week hasn't been posted yet. There is a good reason for it - really, there is. The reason is.......I didn't go for my weigh in this week. Now before you comment on how big a loser I am - let me tell you why:

This past weekend I was in Colorado Springs. (I didn't get to see everyone I wanted, but I knew I'd be going back in a month or so anyway, and I would see those of you I didn't see this time, then...) It was sort of a whirlwind trip flying in on Friday evening, staying the weekend with my wonderful hosts Greg and Elaina Gipson and spending Monday at Compassion and flying home Monday evening.

So, after an awesome day at Compassion we left and headed for the airport. One of my many little quirks is that I like to be at the airport at least 2 hours before my flight leaves, so I was there pretty early. I've also been sick, and so before I went through security I went into the gift shop to buy some cough drops. I'm in the gift shop, looking around when I hear a message over the intercom. I couldn't quite make it out, but I did hear something about a flight being cancelled. Ha ha ha, I thought, suckers! I continue browsing through the store when I hear the announcement again, only this time more clearly: US Airways flight 2725 to Phoenix has been cancelled... I thought, weird, that flight number sounds familiar. Sure enough, when I pulled out my ticket I was on flight 2725. Panicked, I ran out of the gift store and toward the ticket counter. It wasn't until I was about halfway to the ticket counter that I realized that I still had the cough drops in my hand...and I hadn't paid for them. I raced back to the shop - paid for my stolen cough drops and got to the ticket counter, which by now had many people there trying to get other flights out. There were no other flights out. Colorado Springs is not a huge airport, and so I was stuck. While in the non-moving line, I decide to just call US Airways...get the lady on the phone and she's telling me they can't get me back to Phoenix until Wednesday. No, that wouldn't do. By then, I was next in line, and the ticket counter lady gave me my options...I could wait until Wednesday and get a flight out from the Springs, or I could wait until Tuesday the next day) and catch a flight from Denver. Mind you - she was not offering me a connecting flight to Denver...she was offering me a cab ride to Denver, and then my flight. Whatever...I took it. I took the cab. It was free (except for the $36 tip I gave the driver for driving me all that way...) I finally got back Tuesday evening.... and missed my weigh in. Which is probably a good thing. Its hard to stay on the Weight Watchers plan when you're on vacation...

My next weigh in will be this coming Tuesday, and I'll let you know how I'm doing then!

I'll take what I can get...

2008-02-13T22:06:00.002-07:00

Thats what I said last week about my weight loss when I only lost 1.6 pounds. "I'll take what I can get." Well, this week I only lost 0.6 pounds...I want what I took last week! Ha ha ha - no, I slacked this week, I'll admit it. PLUS - they had a membership class at my church where they served an awesome lunch...I had to eat it - I didn't want to be RUDE! :) This weekend I'm on vacation - so who knows where I'll be next week, weight wise!!

Okay, well I better go, I'm a little under the weather and my mom hooked me up with some awesome cough syrup that I think is making me drowsy........................*snore*

Another week

2008-02-06T05:34:00.000-07:00

So another week has passed, thought I'd give you an update on my weigh in last night...ready? Drum roll please: 1.6 pounds lost for a total of 11.2 pounds in 3 weeks. I'd like for it to be coming off faster, but I'll take what I can get!!

Also I have my bible study tomorrow night. We're going through 2 Peter 2, and I came across this verse that really made me think: "But they deliberately forget that long ago by God's word the heavens exsisted and the earth was formed out of water and by water." (2 Pet 2:5) Perhaps not as striking a verse as others, but this one really got me thinking. It says that 'they deliberately forget' God's word and that He is the one who created the world. (Who are "They"? "They" are the scoffers and mockers who doubt God, and speak against his coming.) Anyway - someone who deliberately forgets something doesn't forget it on accident. They make a decision that they are no longer going to believe something, and they forget the things they used to believe. In this case, man had to come up with something to explain away God's account of the creation of the world. What did man come up with? Evolution. These people deliberately forgot what God's word said and how God said HE created the world in 7 days, and they came up with their own explanation of how things came to be...and now - evolution is being taught as fact. Oh, they say its a theory of evolution, but most people today believe that it is fact. That you and I evolved from monkeys and that the biblical story of creation is just that. A story.

There was a lot more in those few little verses...I'll share more that I got from them later! :)

Compassion International

2008-02-01T21:39:00.000-07:00

Okay, well, many of you that read this are either current or former Compassion employees. But I know there are those of you out there who are not as familiar with the ministry of Compassion International...this post is for you.

This month a group of bloggers are heading to Uganda to see first hand Compassion's work in that country. I myself have experienced first (and second) hand Compassion's ministry. I worked for Compassion for 4.5 years before leaving in 2005. It was the best job I ever had. Not only that, I have sponsored three children through my years at Compassion: Cleiton from Brazil, Franci Valdo from Brazil and Lesvia from Guatemala. I have had the incredible opportunity to meet each of these young people in person in their own countries.

My last trip was to Guatemala in 2006. That was an incredible trip!! We got to visit several Compassion projects, and it just reminded me how much I take for granted everything I have. One home we visited was little more than one room that was divided by a partition with a 'crib' for the babies in the 'living room'. The crib was literally an old crate. The baby was playing with a strip of cloth. That was her toy. I was heart broken. But I also know that Compassion is doing a work in that family. The father used to be an alcoholic and with the church and Compassion's help, he is now working and making an income for this family.

I was also fortunate enough to meet Lesvia, my sponsor child and her father on this trip. We spent the day at the Guatemala Zoo. I think the part that broke my heart most was when she was telling me how nervous she was about meeting me, and how she wondered if I would like her. I told her I wondered the very same thing!!

If you are at all interested in sponsoring a child, please click the Compassion banner at the top of this page, or simply click here.

Like I said, I worked at Compassion for almost 5 years, and I know the 'inner workings.' Not only that, I've seen the ministry Compassion does overseas and it is Awesome. God has placed his hand upon Compassion, he really has. Besides I was this closed to being the Co-President of Compassion, so I mean, come on!! ;)

Here are some more pictures from the Guatemala trip in 2006. Enjoy! SPONSOR A CHILD!!

Loser

2008-01-29T21:17:00.001-07:00

Yeah, I'm a loser. I lost 1.6 pounds this week for a total loss (in 2 weeks) of 9.6 pounds. Why is it so much harder for the weight to come off than it was going on?

Ooops

2008-01-27T20:49:00.000-07:00

Okay, so...I have a friend who thinks I'm 'quirky.' I'll admit it - I am. There are certain things I like and certain things I don't like. For instance, when I'm at church I like to sit in the middle of the row that I'm in. This way, if more people come in, they don't have to sit right next to me. Today, though, I hadn't thought it through, and I sat the third seat in from the aisle. Now, ANYONE knows, that if you sit the third seat in from the aisle, then some couple is going to sit down next to you. Right. So, the wife gets there first, and I thought she was alone, so there was still a seat in between us. Phew. Then her husband comes in, and she scoots over right next to me. I'm sitting by a friend of mine, otherwise I would have moved over to have that all important empty seat next to me. Ohay, whatever, I'll remember next time - at least FOUR seats in... So, this morning I'm really feeling the worship and I actually lifted my hands during service. I'm also known for singing with my eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, my neighbor couple was gone...cool. What a great day this is turning out to be. I later realized why the couple left...in my rush to get to church on time, I neglected one very important step before leaving the house this morning - deodorant! It wasn't until I got in my car that I realized I had the dreaded 'funky pit' going on. Another reason to always sit in the middle of the row...

p.s. I'm not really THAT weird for not wanting to have someone I don't know sit next to me, am I?